Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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deleted_user 10/27/2007

Last night I almost wanted to kill myself. The pain and shock was too much. I feel like putting myself in a bath and slicing my wrists. would have done it, should have done it, because I don't feel any different today. He finaly came to tell me the truth. I don't know why he toyed me the way he does.Just the other day he had his hands down my pants and kissing me, telling me it will be okay. He wanted to see others, but still bed me too. This was stilled in my heart. I showed up at his work wanting to hang out and he was such a dick to me. told me the truth. He fell out of love with me awhile back. He didn't love me any more. He has said this once before in the beginning of our relationship, when he got cold feet. I ran, but he chased me. So I let him in again, and again, and again. I fell for him hard, and the whole time now I know this he was playing me like a fish. Catching me and then throwing me back with the line and hook still in my mouth. How can someone do such a thing and get away with it. Have no remorse and think they are the good person. He has ripped me fucking so open, my guts are spilling out. Last night I wanted to slash his tires, I want to burn his stuff, and I want him dead. I want him to die! He doesn't deserve to live and here while I'm living in such neglect, while he is probably sleeping with another victim. Men are so heartless. He needs to get his ass kicked hard. He told me he loved me when he left, and he would be back. He would never desert me, because he knew I was all alone. Last night he told me not to rest on him or rely on him and he's already moving on. I should do the same. He wanted me to go out and make friends, he wanted me to act as though my guts aren't spilling on the floor and say hi to strangers. As though he meant nothing to me, because he is doing the same. I meant nothing to him, although he kept on telling me I did.
He was out with his friends laughing while telling me viciously he didn't love me anymore, and I'm such a crazy bitch. I have done nothing but want to be with him. He told me we could be close friends before all this, and so I tried to do just that. This is what I get, spit in the face and tossed away. God why does he get away with such neglect?

deleted_user 10/27/2007

I so feel your pain. Mine said that he fell out of love with me too. He was nice and caring about it though, and that made it worse. It is the hardest thing to hear.

deleted_user 10/27/2007

He was vicious about it. t only made me want to blow his car. I was there at his car, wish I would have clipped his brakes...but then morals kicked in. I'm such a baby. I still have some ofhis stuff, should throw it away?

deleted_user 10/27/2007

I too felt like killing myself at the beginning. That passed. It is not worth it. It is hard but you have the strength and courage to do it. It may seem like the end of the world now but really this is a temporary crisis. You will get over it and have joy and happiness in your life again but you need to stick around for it. E mail me if you really feel you're going to hurt yourself. Please

deleted_user 10/27/2007

Pack up his stuff. Get it out of sight. Tell him if he wants it to come by by such and such day or it will be gone.

deleted_user 10/27/2007

Don't ever kill yourself over the emotions you are feeling in that moment. That is all they are as a moment. If you work on yourself......this will only be a mere memory. You can get your life back, but you can't let someone take that away from you. You have the control. Please.........if you are feeling suicidal which you are, talk to your good friends. Talk to a counselor. Ask yourself why you are stooping to this over someone that calls you names and disrespects you. Are you going to let someone on this level define your future, or even non existent future? You think he has the control, but it is only if you give him that. Take care.........Let me know how you are doing. Talk to us here. We are all here for you. I will even give you my number if you need to talk to someone. Just message me for it. Okay? You are worth so much more............ Accept, Grieve, and heal........ you will find a better you. We will help you every step of the way.

LarryLDN 10/27/2007

She said she thought we 'drifted apart' and of course I tried arguing why we should work things through. Then I realized She was right!

I'm thankful for all our years together, now it's My Life and time to see what I can do on my own.

deleted_user 10/27/2007

I had to hear those same words, "I don't love you anymore, and haven't for a long time" in front of a counsler no less- after 20 years of what I thought was a pretty good marriage. I felt/still feel like dying but life is too short as it is and no man is worth dying over, especially one so undeserving of our devoted feelings. Everyone says it takes time, learn to do things that make you happy, I know I can't even shop w/o thinking about what "he'd like" but we have to move past this- they have, a little anger is productive but don't damage his property (believe me, my husband came home with a new 30k truck w/o talking to me about it- I've never had such an urge to bash in headlights and key it up- but common sense took over!)I went to the DR. and am now on anti deppressants, they are just starting to kick in after 3 weeks- I feel a little more even tempered and a "little" less emotional though I still cry everyday. I also walk 3-5 miles everyday and vent to friends, it all helps- I'd have to say walking off steam has been the best- I walk in the rain/cold anytime- I'm numb to the elements! Please see a DR. evrything your feeling is normal but don't give into it- it's smart to get some help!

deleted_user 10/27/2007

He treats you like this, because you allow it...you tolerate him coming back, over and over again, even though he treats you like trash...I know this, because for a year, my ex did the same. Said he loved me, wanted to work things out, wanted the physical stuff, then went on to his home, friends, socializing etc as a single guy, like I don't even exist. None of his friends, collegues, other women, etc even knew he was still seeing his ex...well, I finally put a stop to it. Even though I loved this man, I completely cut him off, and have had nothing more to do with him. That was the hardest thing, but the most necessary thing to do....

deleted_user 10/27/2007

I was doing my pill inventory and my gun inventory last night. Kept checking in and then discarding the idea of killing myself tho, think I just had reached a level of discomfort and needed comfort or a way out adn was out of coping skills -- killing myself jsut didn't make sense, no matter how I thought about it. Neither did just quitting and laying on the couch until the foreclosure people came and put me on the street. So I struggled thru the night (my home computer crashed last night, so no DS help, but I knew you guys were there) and am exhausted today, but am recovering slowly but surely from one helluva low point last night. I also thought about the idea that in quitting life you are letting go of everything, when maybe you can choose to just let go of some things -- it doesn't need to be an all-or-nothing proposition. Don't know if that makes sense as I have typed it, but that's my 2 cents -- choose life, brutal as it seems sometimes. I actually got (returned) a phoen call from my little brother today that was very enlightening and heartening and surprising, it was worth sticking around for!

deleted_user 10/27/2007

CandiY - you need to dig deep down and use that strength you have to stop giving into him. He is using you and you deserve better than that. Its his loss not yours.

deleted_user 10/27/2007

I'm not thankful for all the years we had. Makes me feel like he was using me the whole time. I just don't believe that you were in love at all if you can fall out of love. love is unconditional. I have never really fell out of love with my ex's. Still to this day i love them. My very first, he was an alcoholic and I couldn't take it anymore. It wasn't because I fell out of love for him, I just couldn't see himself kill himself slowly. This one really did a number on me and it's selfish of him to scream at me that he doesn't love me anymore, when I was nothing but there for him. I supported him financially and emotionally and all he could do for me if I need the support was tell me he can't be depended on. " he's too young". Now he argues I never treated him like a man...that's all I ever wanted him to be. was a man that stepped up to the plate and acknowledged me as his woman. When I did give him the benefit of being a man, he would tell me he's too young and not ready yet to be one. So I'm always at the mercy of his twists. I feel that this whole relationship was to use me and see how far he could get. Now, I'm pissed. My worry is I don't want him coming here and barging in when I'm not home. To see what else he can steal from me. Girl's watch out for Blake Cooper in Menlo Park, he's a cheater, liar and manipulater. He will make you feel like he loves you, but he'll get bored and if you have no more money, he'll go to the next.

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