I'm dealing with my first unrequited crush after separating from my ex-husband and my feelings oscillate from numbness to utterly broken. I'm terrible at dating. I can't manage to develop feelings or even interest in someone unless I've known them for some time. So when I fell for a friend, I immediately knew I was in trouble because of the long road I had to take to reach that point.
But I know he doesn't feel the same way - or even close to having any sort of curious interest - and I honestly feel helpless. And it's affecting everything I do. I can't focus or escape my depression. I spend most of the day trying not to think about him or the fact that he, like my husband, just doesn't want me.
I'm so incredibly lonely. I haven't been hugged or touched in so damn long and I have nobody to talk to about this. I feel like every day I'm drowning in this and sometimes it's just too much.
I guess I'm just wondering if anyone has gone through some deep attachment after a major split and how you managed to deal with it. Because right now I'm struggling to find a point to anything anymore.
Thanks for letting me vent. I know this all sounds dramatic, but I'm really at a loss here.
I don’t like how everytime i do one little thing wrong i get so negative towards myself. for example: today i had trouble getting my calculator open and just thought “wow what the fuck is wrong with you? you’re so stupid” etc. it sounds stupid when i type it or say it out loud but it’s so frequent especially at school. like i tell myself i’m gonna be nicer and not be so hard on...
hi im Jess. i was diagnosed with bi polar disorder with mixed episodes about 4 years ago and am still struggling to get it under control. im not sure if it's 1 or 2, but probably 1 considering how severe my symptoms are. ive been on meds for the past few months now, trying different ones to see what'll help and that's been a fun rollercoaster lol. ive been leaning way more towards the...