Sent H an email yesterday basically saying things that I know he compares her to me. Please look at the big picture, marraige is hard, maybe easier for him to start new than try and fix things w/ me. I know I'm a desparate dope. He read it this morning (7:21 am EST-not that I'm tracking it or anything-lol). No response but I know he had to work. Just feeling lost and lonely right now. Wanting to hear his voice but know I can't call-won't call. We have a wedding to go to this weekend and I'm only going to the church. Told him I couldn't go the reception and pretend, I would only be going there to spend time w/ him and could only go if we were a couple. I think the only reason he wants me to go is so he won't have to answer any questions about where I am. But anyway, someone please pick me up today.
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