Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
My wife and I are six weeks into a one year separation while living in the same house (virginia). Her attorney has suggested to her that we do not go out to dinner or anywhere together, to prevent dissolving the separation.
Currently, I leave flowers and a short note (ie: "we could still stop this, I love you, scott") on the fireplace mantel in our bedroom each week. She hasn't thrown the flowers away nor the notes. She just leaves them there.
Can anyone think of some other loving, corney, unique, etc; ideas that might give her a boost and at least consider the option to end this separation. I've become the goat now for our marraige, but I'm OK with that, if I can find some way to make her realize how devoted I am to her.
Thanks to all my new friends, scott
Currently, I leave flowers and a short note (ie: "we could still stop this, I love you, scott") on the fireplace mantel in our bedroom each week. She hasn't thrown the flowers away nor the notes. She just leaves them there.
Can anyone think of some other loving, corney, unique, etc; ideas that might give her a boost and at least consider the option to end this separation. I've become the goat now for our marraige, but I'm OK with that, if I can find some way to make her realize how devoted I am to her.
Thanks to all my new friends, scott
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
Can you help a brother out?
www.marriagebuilders.com
Trying to win someone, who doesn't want to be won, is only going to hurt You.
We-who were devoted to our marriages-could totally pour our hearts out on What would bring things to a grinding hault. Things that probably wouldn't cost a damned penny.
But, if she doesn't want to remain married, it isn't going to help, and it will only make you hurt worse.
It might mean something good, or it might just mean she is neither taking them nor throwin them out: she is just leaving them alone along with your marriage. So, you can't read her mind or too much into it. You can just keep trying. Your wife is a depressive, so constancy should mean a lot to her.
- poems (written by you, of course)
- birdfeeder or birdbath outside her window
- bubble bath/bath beads
- Take an online quiz about which perfume is matches her personality -- answer the questions yourself -- and then print out the quiz and give it to her w/ the perfume.
- Personalized M&Ms in a pretty dish with something funny or personal
Good Luck!
If you never cleaned the house -do that without mentioning it ever again.
Clean and wash her car.
Leave a giftcard for a spa or massage parlor on her bed.
There is millions of small things that you can do to make her happy, but dont mention them or leave cards. Just things you haven't done before to make her happy. Wait for her to come to you, dont expect her to thank you immediately and DO NOT sound or act needy.
a) she has your children
b) you love her eyes..
etc.
Then onthe first one tell her why you are writing these notes...leave one on her car seat, one in her make up box, on her windshield, mail one to her at work, have one delivered to work with flowers etc.
You must tell me then how much you are willing to work on the relationship
a) go to counselling
b) be accessible always ( get a blackberry)
c) do more things together
d) admit when you are wrong
e) plan a couples vacation
Try your hardest to remind her of the man she fell in love with.. best of luck.. let us know...
the idea being consistency and longevity and you should break down her barriers.. if there is a chance to reconcile
More info is needed for good suggestions.
Listening includes not forming responses in your head while the other person is still talking. Listening is waiting until the other person finished talking and then responding with what you think you understood them to say and waiting for confirmation or clarification.
Part of listening is also paying attention to nonverbals. 97% of communication is nonverbal.
Based on that, actions speak louder than words. Most people will pay more attention to the actions than the words if they don't match.
I hope things work out the way you want.