They definately do not feel any heartache or pity for us,in my case my stbx is angry with me and he is the one cheating!! I agree its like a show, everyone seem to be waiting to see what will happen next.

Yeah - My husband is the same way - he is mad at me and he was the one who cheated on me too. Makes no sense

I did ask myself that & determined it was my fault for caring about someone who didn't care about me. So now I don't. You know the old saying " Don't cast your pearls before swine" Good saying really.

It is a good saying Blah. I understand that completely.

It does seem strange. My stbx is the one who left me for another, I think that is already over, she wanted the divorce and seems content with her life now. I mean why in the hell would a woman married to a guy with a good job, a home body, a dedicated father just up and ask for a divorce? answer, she thought she found something better. Where was love when I needed it?

I think my husband is in pain, but I wonder if it's more about losing our family life than actually losing me. I've been struggling with the heartache for years, and he's just been hanging out, not that happy, but not miserable like me. I think some people just handle things differently. Just lately I've started to get the feeling that he really doesn't want to lose ME, and that's good to know. But you're right, the ones who are killing themselves trying to figure out what to do seem to be the ones suffering, and the other one seems to just be cruising along.

I browsed through a book called "The New Creative Divorce," by Mel Krantzler, and the main thing I got out of it was this: As long as you keep replaying your hurt and anger over the marriage, it's not really over.

Easier said than done, I know, but this somewhat obvious message gave me a little bit of a jolt. I'm mainly hurt and angry over the years I've already wasted; sure don't want to waste any more. When this thing is over, I want it to be over.

Good question bk2azmom.

Good thought Daisy, "when this thing is over I want it to be over"...I'm tired and need to move on.

Maybe some enjoy being the movie drama of the week especially in affairs. Just been a very painful time...almost over now.

They say No man or woman is worth your tears and the ones worth keeping would never make you cry.

GREAT ONE LAURA!! Yes the ones worth keeping would never make you cry.

Well, you do need to give yourself some time to normally grieve...especially you, Glenn, you're having a really hard time right now and can't expect to feel serene all the time. Still I'm sure there will come a day...

I hope to never cry over a woman again. I just want to loved as I can love.

It's like that old Martin Briley song: "..but I won't cry for the wasted years, cause you ain't worth the salt in my tears"

Life summed up with cheesy 80's music!

I'm sure your ex/stbx feels just as broken up about it, but doesn't show it in the same way. my husband I know is feeling it lately, at least from the few friends of his that will still talk to me. we all just deal with things in different ways.

There is no pain on my ex's end. I also gave up on the show for him. Made no difference.