Perhaps you feel that way because you ae only whole when giving and receiving love. Or, you are further down the road to recovery and so you are at that point where you want to date again. Or all of the above.

This notion of "I'm in a relationship first, so I WIN" is so ripe for things to go the wrong way.
Rebounding, ignoring red flags, repeating behaviors that have not been properly addressed...the list goes on.

The best way to truly "win" in this situation is to take time out and heal. If there are things you need to work on, work on them. Don't just ignore them and figure they'll go away if you get into another relationship.

And no, this is not aimed at you specifically. I'm not saying you were the reason for your relationship not working out. These are just some things to keep in mind.

Well considering my sbtx cheated on me and is choosing her new relationship over having contact with her children...no I don't want to get in any relationship right now. I am not healthy or strong enough right now. I need to work on me.

I'm not sure that I am ready. I just want to be able to stop thinking about her, and maybe if I met someone that would help. I guess I just don't know what the best way to recover is. I am still devastated and crushed by all this.

I felt it was better to wait to get into a new relationship. My ex had practically moved in with someone else within just a few months of us separating. Everyone's comments were that it seemed awfully quick given that he had been telling everyone all he wanted was me back and still calling me his wife when he talked about me! I waited until I felt ready and I think that was the best thing for me. It is not a competition and it will not necessarily make you stop thinking about her. It will just make you compare everyone you meet to her if you are not healed.

No,my ex already found someone (she was cheating and moved in with him while the divorce was happening). So I think I want to wait and work on me first. Be a little selfish for a bit.

If you were to get into a relationship at this time to help you get over your wife, do you actually think it would work? Or have you thought of the possibility that you could be risking hurting an innocent in the process? Especially if she does not know what she is getting into because of what you are going through? Please be careful and to use an old phrase, think before you leap!

Dating-booooo, ick, hissssss. Sorry. Had to do that.

Why can't we find a way to meet up with people as Friends??? No pressure, no expectations, no DRAMA???

As far as getting "out there" ahead of the stbx/ex, take your eyes off of Them and FOCUS on Yourself. Give YOU a Gift. Learn who You are. This is Your Time.

I have a huge sign over my door. "It's All About ME!!!"

Yes, I really AM being just that selfish. First time in my life. I need that. You do, Too.

We ALL need Friends of the opposite sex. We are starving for voices, input, companionship...that will cause us to "fall in love" with the first thing that comes along if we are not careful.