
Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

deleted_user
In a lot of the posts I see people suggest counselling to their spouse when they are already in marriage trouble. I was wondering if marriage counselling shouldn't actually have started at the beginning of marriage so that it doesn't fail in the first place.
We pay car insurance hoping we can protect ourselves from some catastrophic accident, so wouldn't counselling before conflict be some sort of insurance or buffer to prevent divorce?
We pay car insurance hoping we can protect ourselves from some catastrophic accident, so wouldn't counselling before conflict be some sort of insurance or buffer to prevent divorce?
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On the other hand, if couple actively works on their relationship with a counselor while things are good, they are developing skills that will help get them through the bad times.
IF, I ever get into another committed relationship, it would be on the condition that my partner was willing for us to educate ourselves on good marriage skills, actively 'work' on the marriage before major problems arise and be willing to take the lead sometimes on going to marriage seminars, reading books together, counseling, etc. I also believe, for me, I would need someone who is actively working on his self, trying to understand himself and make himself a better person (even outside of the marriage). As someone here said, "You can't change what you can't acknowledge."
Tall order, I know but after what I've learned going through this separation, I will never again believe that 'love is enough' or 'love conquers all'. It takes so much more to have a really great marriage, or even a good one.