I've been doing a lot of thinking as to why I ended up in the kind of marriage I have. It's ocurred to me that the beginning of our relationship had a lot of "red flags." He was the first and only guy I dated. I was 19 when we got married. I had grown up VERY sheltered and had over-protective parents. I was desperate to get out of my parents' house. And, now look. I'm getting ready to leave 11 years of marriage because of abuse. I can see it now. Hindsight is 20/20, right? But, if this is at least part of the cause, why aren't we talking about this more? I mean, why aren't we telling young girls (and guys) about the consequences of marrying too young and all that? If I had only known . . .
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...