Hello... I am new to this but really told myself last night that I have to start talking out loud about my situation. I wanted to seek professional help but I don't havethe extra money to do so. I hope I can learn something from the experienced on here... So a VERY long story sort of short. I have been married for over 6 years now and with the same guy for 11 years. We had a baby in April of last year. In Nov of last year i learn he has been cheating on me and had a full relationship with another woman (who has two kids herself.) This was going on for only a month. So I moved me and my daughter out and tried to move on. He then tries to come back which i allow thinking it is the best for our child and yes i still loved him. Well then he just leaves a month later to be back with the same girl. He has been coming back in and leaving again up until two weeks ago. I know this is partially my fault because i have allowed this to happen. I guess i just don't understand why i hold on to him so much. He obviously does not care about me at all. I try to let go and really there isn't much love there anymore after all the hurt. I have stood there beside him through everything. His was in the millitary and we had to deal with all of that emtional baggage. He has lied most of his life down to what he would eat for breakfast. I always new this was a problem of his and of course i stayed and tried to get him help. Two weeks ago he text me all night just to tell me he no longer wants to be "here." To the point we had to go breakdown his apt door to make sure he was okay. One day he tells me he wants a future for our family and the next day he tells me he hates me. I really do think he is bipolar - which i have been telling him for years. His dad is and so is his brother... The good person in me tries to stand by him to get him help but in the end i am getting emtionally train wrecked. It is just so hard for me because we have an extremely young child involved. I want to do right by her by that is where my mind gets knotted. He wants to see her every other weekend but i don't even feel he is emtionally stable to have her but legally i cannot do anything about it. I don't want to see my daughter hurt at all. I also need help to move on from his pulling me back and forth. We had so many good times together and it really hurts to know that they won't be anymore but how do i realize that... I think I fool myself into thinking we will work out one day but why would i even want that.
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