Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
It has been 7 months since my wife left after 14.5 years of marriage and almost 20 years together. Other than the regular issues married couples can have with each other, she had no serious complaints about me. She just didn't want to be married any longer. Not to me. Not to anyone.
I can honestly say that I was happy for most of those 20 years. (The last month and a half were bad but that was the time she had decided to leave and was acting loveless to me.) Yes there were bad times but looking back now I see only the good times and wonderful memories.
They say that such a break-up is like experiencing a death, but not until recently have I really understand that. Emotionally it certainly has felt that way, but at a deeper level that person who I was with for almost 20 years has died. She still exists and I still get along with her very well but it is not the same person. I often thought that I was grieving for the loss of my marriage but now feel that I am grieving over the loss of that person that I shared my life with. I still see her and talk to her but it is not the same person. It feels that she has died and I really miss her.
I can honestly say that I was happy for most of those 20 years. (The last month and a half were bad but that was the time she had decided to leave and was acting loveless to me.) Yes there were bad times but looking back now I see only the good times and wonderful memories.
They say that such a break-up is like experiencing a death, but not until recently have I really understand that. Emotionally it certainly has felt that way, but at a deeper level that person who I was with for almost 20 years has died. She still exists and I still get along with her very well but it is not the same person. I often thought that I was grieving for the loss of my marriage but now feel that I am grieving over the loss of that person that I shared my life with. I still see her and talk to her but it is not the same person. It feels that she has died and I really miss her.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
My situation was different, my X did turn into a huge jerk, but he has "came to", so to speak and he's very different.
I feel like he's died too, and it's so heartbreaking, because the person he is now doesn't hold a candle to the old guy. It suck. It's sad. It does get better though.
Hugs.
I am so sorry to hear that. I only lasted 3years. I cant imagine the pain you feel. I do agree that it is like a death. People dies and you still love them and miss them but they are not the same!
I feel very abandoned and alone. It is really hard and I think it is hard for other people who are not going through to understand.
It hurts and it sucks but stay strong and you will get through this.