
Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

deleted_user
Before you start throwing rocks at me, please read this and TRY to understand before judging me.
I am just beginning going through a divorce from my husband of 8 years. For the past 2 years in our marriage I have received little to no emotional, physical or mental support. I dropped 30 pounds last year because I was so depressed and knew that our marriage was at a stand still. Unfortunately, about 5 months ago, I met someone who gave me the emotional support that I so badly needed and I took it. I WAS WRONG TO DO SO AND I KNOW THAT!
Background: After a lot of counseling and psychotherapy, I have learned that this is not all the fault of myself or my husband...but also of my parents. I am 35 years old and have never been told by my parents "I love you". I have never been given a hug, a kiss on the forehead when I was sick...nothing. I was however given trips to Europe, designer clothes, a car at 16... I now realize that I would have rather been homeless than have had any of those material goods...I just want my parents to tell me they love me. Is this making sense to anyone?
Again, this in not an excuse for what I did, I just want to be able to be on this site to because I need support too! I need the help of others too! I just wanted to be honest with all of you.
Anyway, I married someone like my parents, who doesn't communicate or show any emotion. Beyond this he allows his parents to belittle me on a constant basis without sticking up for me. I try to stick up for myself, but it is just not possible with my mother-in-law.
Is there anyone out there like me? Is there anyone out there that understands this at all? Let me know, please.
I am just beginning going through a divorce from my husband of 8 years. For the past 2 years in our marriage I have received little to no emotional, physical or mental support. I dropped 30 pounds last year because I was so depressed and knew that our marriage was at a stand still. Unfortunately, about 5 months ago, I met someone who gave me the emotional support that I so badly needed and I took it. I WAS WRONG TO DO SO AND I KNOW THAT!
Background: After a lot of counseling and psychotherapy, I have learned that this is not all the fault of myself or my husband...but also of my parents. I am 35 years old and have never been told by my parents "I love you". I have never been given a hug, a kiss on the forehead when I was sick...nothing. I was however given trips to Europe, designer clothes, a car at 16... I now realize that I would have rather been homeless than have had any of those material goods...I just want my parents to tell me they love me. Is this making sense to anyone?
Again, this in not an excuse for what I did, I just want to be able to be on this site to because I need support too! I need the help of others too! I just wanted to be honest with all of you.
Anyway, I married someone like my parents, who doesn't communicate or show any emotion. Beyond this he allows his parents to belittle me on a constant basis without sticking up for me. I try to stick up for myself, but it is just not possible with my mother-in-law.
Is there anyone out there like me? Is there anyone out there that understands this at all? Let me know, please.
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You cheated and it is your responsibility, not your parents. They may have made mistakes in raising you, but you chose to cheat.
Regardless of who cheated on who, you will find that people are accepting here!
People who are deprived of affection in childhood are often led into bad relationships by their need for it. Try to see the patterns and stop repeating them.
Courting behavior is not marital behavior. All the emotional energy in our marriage came from me. When I pulled back to see what was there, the answer was nothing. I am affectionate and demonstrative, he is not. I talk, he does not. I stay and deal, he runs home to mommy. End of story.
the book helped me come to terms with my own childhood, forgive my parents, they only did what They knew how to do, and that was what helped me become a better parent.
the beauty of 'the eternal now' is that you can always choose at any given Now to throw out your history and start over. Ya may have some physical situation to take care of, but how you think about things is your own choosing.
If you didn't like something, learn from it and vow to never do that again, that way.
Just keep looking forward and not behind. Does the wake drive the boat?
I agree that it is my responsibility that I had the affair and not my parents, but what I failed to mention is that they were not there for me as a child and now they are supporting my husband, knowing all that I have been through in the marriage. They are simply justifying the lack of support they have given me emotionally my entire life. I mean what parents would support the spouse and not speak to their own child???
All I know is I am a parent of 2 and I have learned a load from this. I tell my children daily that I love them and I show them with hugs and meaningful conversations. No one is perfect, but supporting our children is a priority in my life. I am different from this experience... stronger, more loving, less judgemental, and happier.
Good Luck to you.
Your friend,
Lisa
abusehurts