Everyone is so different. i stayed with my stbx for a couple of weeks until I got my house. I hated it. But again such a personal decision. we will be here to support you

I feel for you. I found out on the 1st day of my emergency leave that she was done trying. It has been very tense at times, I know it can be very hard. I'm fortunate in that it has only been for 2 weeks that I was staying with her, and it was only because I wanted to be with my kiddos when they went to bed and when they got up in the morning and everywhere in between. In your case it sounds like it is going to be longer term and I think you should look for alternatives. I can't imagine having to live like that for a long period of time. Of course, only you know what you can deal with and what you are willing to put up with. At the very least I think you should have a talk with your stbx about how you feel.

I've been living like this for three months now. It will probably be a few more before either she's out or we sell the house. My situation is economics, but more and more it's to see my daughter.
There is no OW/OM, but the tension is still there.
Sorry, no answers or suggestions as at this point I dont even know I'm still coping! Good luck and if your ever need an ear to bend come find me.

I feel for you. I have a moving van in my driveway, boxes in my house. I am finally getting Out.

Living with the STBX is Hell. I think that I see stretch marks on my eyes from the swelling from crying.

I have only had to last since the first of August. I can't imagine the length of time you are looking at. I had just started to turn loose of hope.

Is there Any Way that you could get an apartment or rent a house that is close?

Could you keep the house and make Him move?

My thoughts and prayers are with you. I am so sorry. That is a long time.

Did it for close to 3 years.

He tried to drive me crazy.. and force me to leave the house.... drove me and the children nuts.

I remember clearly Xmas 2005 my youngest daughter saying out loud.. I want to kill myself.. a 5 year old..saying that out loud.

She kept asking when was he going to leave..
last year this time we were almost homeless... the kids ate at my folks.. I stayed in the house 24/7.. holding my ground. He was terrorizing us.

I paid him well.. gave him half.. paid off all his debts.. declined spousal..gave him my half of his pension... and the bastard didn't leave until after the divorce.

can't give you advice.. stay strong.. we lived in the same house like strangers.. only talked about the kids issues.
At the end when he would hell about terms.. and selling .. etc. I would shout back.. talk to my lawyer!.. I will not talk to you about this. Talk to my lawyer.. he knew then I was unable to stand up for myself but I was clear enough to get an advocate to do it. A Shark.

Find that boy a friends couch to sleep on, you are getting pain slapped in your face every time you are around him. I lined up a sofa for my stbx and he stayed there until we sorted our crap out and made a plan. The day he left was awful, but the relief that I could be there and feel what I wanted to feel was such a relief.
If that isn't a possibility make your bedroom your haven and stay in there. Make sure you have tv, books, phone, candles, music whatever and escape.
Your kids probably feel the tension between you, maybe the less time together the better for them too.

im living with stbx too. we are legally seperated since june and getting a divorce. the boys are 9 and 10 and we havent sat down yet to tell them because in july we were in reconciliation and in september back divorce proceedings. he is a f'n pr...k He had the heat on only 63 yesterday and during the summer he didnt want me to run the aircond't. we dont talk to each other much at all and we are not even agreeing on things like kids bedtime. its a mess. we go to mediation in less than a week for custody. wish me luck

Yup...its hell. We're doing it for financial reasons until I finish school. I'm looking at another 2 years of this. I have no other alternatives. Its agony. I've set very clear boundaries, but he keeps stepping over them. Just had to have another conversation about them last night...well, it turned into a huge argument like always. I can tell you this much...I WILL make it thruogh this, and as soon as I graduate and land a job....I'll be outta here so fast, his head will spin. I have no real words of advice other than to set very clear boundaries, live like civil roommates and avoid each other as much as possible.

I am right there with you. My stbx wanted the divorce...the house has not sold...she lived with her bf for several months then moved back into the house when they broke up. Tensions are to the moon and the whole situation really bites. I know exactly what your going through. Hugs and hang in there.

I too am still living with stbx mostly for our son, but also for his economic situation. I cannot recommend it. Other people are stronger than I am, but I have to say it is killing me.

No non no. He moved out and never came back. That would never work for me!!

Im still living with mine and will be for another 5 weeks. Oddly enough, in a lot of ways we're getting along better than we were before her affair became public and the decision to divorce made. We still sleep in the same room, and actually do the stuff of married couples. Even this morning she asked me for the first time in our entire married life if I wanted her to iron my shirt.
Weird

OK, I DID IT AND OMG I ALMOST LOST IT DAILY!!!
Would NOT recommend if can be avoided. Me, if I left house, I'd have got screwed royally by judge, and custody and friend of the court with two small ones. I have house, divorce final month ago, she still comes and goes, my atty. finally told me I could change locks last night, but honestly, I know that'd cause more stress on the kids. She moves permanently to her own place in Jan. I hope I can sustain till then, but she's not stayin here, which is ok by me. she'd also flaunt her cell phone in my face, whcich I had my atty. subpoena text and usage in case needed to say she'd neglected the kids at times when texting/calling instead of parenting. it worked so well for me in every aspect but getting her permanently out of the house. minus her bf's house, she has no place for kids to stay over night but my house... (her excuse anyway.)
May God give you the strength to hold on for your son's sake. maybe your stbx will get fed up soon and move in with OW?

Well, we stayed together until the house sold -- but ours was not a divorce for reasons of infidelity or anger. Nonetheless, it was hard, because I think he kept his hopes up the whole time -- wouldn't even pack. It made the leaving time all the harder for us both. But financially, that's what we had to do.

Hang in there girl! I'm in the same position. I have 6 mo old twins and he is filing for divorce. I recently found out about the OW. Both of us refuse to move but it's hell. The kids can feel the tension but I don't want to get screwed in the divoce so I decided to stay here. Our house in foreclosing and we can really be here either until the bank takes it back or the divorce is final. I'd like to keep in touch so we can help each other or just be a shoulder to cry on or a ear to listen.