I can not feel any more dead inside then I do at this moment. My ex-boyfriend who I still currently live with, has gone away for a week again to go see his "friend" We spent some time together last night and we get along for the most part but knowing that he doesn't want me anymore and that he is obseseed with this girl just destroys me inside. There is a huge part of me that wishes that he wouldn't come back and I never had to see his face again. It's a sick cycle....he hurts me but when he is being nice to me I want to be around him and not be alone but being around him I get the no emotion, no love, no affection and I just want to die!
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