I am hoping for some support from this site,as I am absolutely terrified! A little background: I am 36 years old,married for just under 2 years. Between us,we have 5 children--ranging in age from 18-10. I have had m.s. for 9 years,and suffered my first seizure last month after a very hot camping trip. Since my first mri in 1999(since the dx of m.s.),there has been a suspicious "mass" in my right frontal lobe. The option presented to me at that time was either biopsy it,or take a watch and see approach. Of course I took the second option,as I thought(and the docs did too),that it was an m.s. lesion(although it was a lot larger than the m.s.lesions were). Fast forward 9 years later--after ordering an mri for me in the hospital after the seizure(and I had not been told to have one since 2004),they discovered that mass has actually now doubled in size,and they are saying it has been getting progressively bigger this whole time,although the mri reports always came back that it was the same. Apparently,they were only comparing the current mri from the PREVIOUS year's--but when you look at the one from 1999,to every year after,you can plainly see that it has gotten larger. So,now I have met with 2 neurosurgeons this past week,and they both are recommending something be done,although their approaches are a little different. I am now fighting with my insurance,because I want to go to the larger city hospital,instead of the smaller community hospital that is closer to my home. The bigger one just has better technology,and I would be operated on by one the best surgeons in the country. So,now I feel like I am in limbo,and I am very anxious to get this taken care of--although on the other hand,would like to just keep burying my head in the sand,and keep pretending this is not there. I am so MAD--I have learned to deal with the m.s.,and have made peace with that. NOW,I have a probable brain tumor on top of that?! I am so scared,as is my husband.I am trying to just raise our family,and am now faced with a million unknowns. Unknowns about the surgery,about the complications that would arise from the surgery(esp having m.s.),and what if this is cancer? Please,I am looking for some emotional support,as I feel like I have now landed in hell. Sorry for the novel,Lisa
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