Can you sit down and talk with them, and tell them how their behavior is hurting you? If they didnt' realize it, that would help them. If they're being cruel, which I doubt, it certianly won't make matters worse.

As far as your difficulty with running into things, have you seen a low vision doctor or somebody who could do some therapy for you? I know there are coping skills that can be taught to help your problem greatly. Unfortunately I don't know the names of any of them. Look into it, though. It's out there somewhere.

Try to talk to them about this.
Also another thing you might want to go to your local assoc. for the blind & visully impaired.

I know how it feels all too well. My spouse teases me all the time about my sight. It really bothers me. I've tried to talk to him but says i'm too sensitive.

At work, it's been a challenge too but on a whole it's better then at home. Over the years people have asked me about it, though some customers(who don't know that I'm losing my sight) will still make comments"what are you blind?""do you need my glasses?" and I've had to grow a thicker skin to function. People can just be cold sometimes, and sometimes not even realize it. But with family. I agree.. they should be supportive. not hurtful. family should be the one place you feel safe. talk to them.

Mahadra (beautiful name,by the way).
Perhaps,one of the best ways with dealing with the cruel and unkind comments, is have a honest comment back. For example..if you happen to stumple into the coffee table,just comment with confidence "oh,there's my eyes acting up with me again". You don't have to appologize or feel embarresed about what you do with your visual condition. That's what you have, and you are making the best of it. Smile, and wink at others,and stay at "arms" (eyes)length from those who will alway give out the "wise cracks". You may even comment by saying,"I can live without the wise cracks" And then laugh at yourself.
I practices Behavior Optometry for 33 years,before retireing;and advised my patients if they could show confendence with any visual situation,they would become a "visual hero"
Carry On...Eyes

Awww .. ur story is so touching ..

Yeah .. tell em that they r hurting u ..

I won't let anyone do that kind of thing to my daughter ..

We can be kind, but firm .. as we tell them how they have need to treat us ..

If u need some muscle .. (lol) .. I can lend a hand ..

Hi there...and yes, I understand very well. I've lost most of the sight in my right eye due to retinopathy and I feel my balance is all 'off' most of the time!

I have blind spots and my depth perception isnt great, especially as I have retinopathy in my left eye also (altho not to the same degree)and nerve damage which casues night blindness.

I think it's human nature to try to almost make a joke of it when you bump into things (believe me I do that a lot!) in order to look as if you're dealing with it. I think in today's society, we are bombarded with 'heroes' in the media (people who have overcome incredibly tough physical and emotional problems to go on to climb a mountain or sail around the world lol), and people sometimes expect everyone to be this way.

Well, we're all human and we all have good and bad days. Sometimes we're able to laugh with those people who crack jokes and other times it can be hurtful.

I think the key is to react to those situations honestly - if you don't feel like laughing when you bump into something, say 'ow!' instead of trying to laugh it off and hopefully those around you will pick up on your 'vibe'.

I wish you all the best and if you ever need to talk, drop me a line.

xx

Mitz :
You said...."I think the key is to react to those situations honestly - if you don't feel like laughing when you bump into something, say 'ow!' instead of trying to laugh it off and hopefully those around you will pick up on your 'vibe'"

You right to "read" the situation and then react in a postive fashion. The old saying " Honestly is the best Policy" plays True.

Carry On...Eyes

i have the blindness problem in my right eye as well. i crash into at least 5 things a day. you can sit them down and talk to them. or you could start shoving them into things and be like not so funny when it happens to you (tho most people wouldnt do that to others.) just try talking to them or trying to make them understand how it feels. have them cover their right eye for a day and see how much that stuff happens to them. maybe then they would understand.

Hey! I'm almost completely blind in my right eye as well. And i have no perepheral vision in that eye, and very little in my right eye. So you can know how much I run into things. I tend to even run into other people that I dont know while walking in somewhere like the mall. My best advice to you is to learn to laugh at yourself. My family and friends make fun of me all the time when I do embarassing things, I find myself tripping over everything! I know that if I wasn't comfortable laughing at myself though, that my friends and faimly wouldnt do it so much. Maybe just sit down and talk to your family about it, they will understand if you tell them it hurts your feelings when they make fun of you. But like I said before, laughing at yourself is the best therapy I swear! Hope that hels!
Alicia Rose

Yep, I do indeed understand.

I recently accepted the fact that I had to get O&M training when I realized that I was wearing jeans or slacks all the time to protect my legs from tables and chairs. My legs always had cuts and bruises. (sigh) I miss wearing skirts. I can't help being a girly girl. Heels have had to give way to flats and running shoes, too.

I've had a few Helen Keller jokes come my way, too. I've also heard the lovely phrase, "Hey! I know something blind people can do!" once too often as well. Look them in the eye and tell them that their words hurt, and then walk away. If they have any redeeming human qualities, they will feel about one inch tall and apologize.

When they apologize, tell them you'll forgive them on one condition: They have to make you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while their eyes are taped shut. I've done this with a co-worker, even brought the ingredients to work so she could do it in front of everybody. Few tasks are more humbling or more instructive than that one.

Yes, I've bounced off of walls and walked though a glass sliding door that I THOUGHT was open. My face was a mess from the scalp lac and I couldn't convince the EMT or the ER nurse that I couldn't see before the accident. They had to call in an ophthalmologist to consult, thinking I needed emergency surgery.

If you haven't yet. get the cane, get the training. It's not the end of the world; it just feels like it at first.


- Randa

Mahadra,
As far as getting made fun of I get that all the time. I know the frustration you are talking about. beings how I leagaly blind in both eyes. I just don't think they realise what what they are doing to you. I know the balance problem you speak of. I have had the cane & the training. for a little more than a month now. It had made a difference. although the cats seem to hiss & scream at me quite a bit. usually from me stepping on them. I feel sorry about that. I get teased about this all the time & I get angry about this & say Let's see you deal with this problem on a daily basis. As they say walk a mile in my shoes & see how you feel. Don't fell like it is hopeless. We are all here for you...

Jason

Hey Mahadra,
Im sorry that your going through this and it is a hard thing to cope with. You should sit your family down and talk to them about it. My mom use to joke/tease me when I would run into things or fall. I know she didnt mean to hurt my feelings but once I talked to her she apologised cuz she didnt know that it was hurting me. So I think you should do that with you family.

Also check with the Commission for the Blind in your state and they have mobility experters to help you learn how to be more independent so that you can have the freedom and independence you deserve. I myself have been embarressed by things I have run into. If you ever need to talk. Im here. I hope that some of this helps. We are here to support you. (smile) Take it easy.

Mahadra,

On thing I have learned in this life is that you just have to laugh! I know it might be hard right now, but you have to find something that makes you laugh. Books on tape are very important to me.

I am lucky because my family is very supportive. My husband's attitude is that I can still do anything I could before, except drive a car!
You've gotten a lot of really good advice from the postings you already have. The only thing I feel that I might add is that you may want to contact your Vocational Rehabilitation through the Department of Labor. They hooked me up with training at my local Association for the Blind.
Also, ask you local phone comapny if they offer free directory assistance for the visually impaired. The first month I had my free DA I used it 87 times! Now, I am a walking rolodex!

I am interested to know how you are able to function with every day tasks (other than walking! LOL).
You do need to talk to your family and let them know that this is affecting you deeply. Blindness is too hard when you don't have the right support!
Amy
P.S. Feel free to email me directly if you need to "chat".

Mahadra,
I too am new to this forum. I joined in order to help understand my nephew who is 17 and is going blind in both eyes. He won't even leave his home or my sister's side due to fear of falling or running into things.

I'm not sure why your family is reacting the way they are, except maybe they too are scared and that is the only way they know to deal with their pain for you. Let them know how much it hurts you, and that you really need them to be a source of strength and encouragement for you.

I personally can't imagine what it must be like to be in your situation, but I want you to know that there are people in this world who really do care about you and the obstacles you are faced with on a daily basis.

Try to stay strong! You are an inspiration to others even if you don't feel that way.

Jami