Ok, I felt that way for about 2 hours yesterday and it's stinking thinking but it's also part of the disease so don't beat yourself up. Unfortunately our path in life is very challenging. But you are so not alone. I also go from good to very bad too often even with the meds, but have learned to cope with it better. My heart goes out to you at this trying time. Stay tough and reach out to friends. xo Calm

ok do i see this a a pleae for help or are you really goingto hurt your self it wont solve any thing please talk to me i dont know how much i cn help i notas good as some other people on here but i am up

Why would you want to further harm yourself? That's not helpful. You are in a pit of depression and that is a very unkind place to be but that doesn't mean you have to beat yourself up physically. That's not a rational choice. It only makes it harder to recover. Think of it as a time out. A safe place. A place where you don't have to think you can just be. It doesn't have to all be a negative. I know it's hard when you are in the pit of despair to see the light. But your brain is LYING to YOU!! It's a chemically induced LIE!! You can overcome it. No need to hurt yourself. Take care of yourself. Be kind to you. You are the most important thing.

I feel this way all the time. Since I have been comming to ths community and learning about BP I have learned how to calm down a bit and know this isnt my fault.
Also, we have a place to go that someone is always here ~that I have found~ for support.
We are not alone anymore.

So true. We are NOT ALONE!! I never knew so many people were so much like me and I felt so different my entire life and here I am a garden variety manic depressive. Just another folk getting through the day with my meds and moods. It's nice to be one of the crowd!! And were a damn talented, interesting and courageous crowd of people from all walks of life. It's been edifying and humbling being on this site.

How long have you been diagnosed? Are you taking any meds yet?

It really sucks, but the good news is, everyone here has it, too.

So we understand how you feel.

Taking meds is not wonderful, either, but if you work at it, you will likely find something that helps even your moods out, although not altogether.

Even when on meds, you'll still have some episodes of depression and mania once in a while, but not so often, and not so intense.

Also, the risk of self-harm and suicide is significantly lower if you take meds.

You and those around you will be safer and calmer.

I resisted for a long time, but once I've found something that actually helps, I am glad I'm on them. Otherwise, I would be dead or locked up, too.

You may need hospitalization to help you get a balance again, and that's OK...a lot of us have been there, done that, too.

i hope at this point you are somewhere getting help. but if not, do not hurt yourself any further.
we all understand how you feel. and i know it sucks to be in the hospital, but sometimes you just have to go untill the feeling past. and maybe get some new meds while in there.
please be ok. we all care.