my life is falling apart nothing is right. My life is a mess nothing makes sense. I can’t eat sleep or sit still. I go to my Dr today and all she wants to do is give me more medicine. I don’t want a pill I want my life to make sense I don’t think a damn pill will do that. Shit I told myself not to write and I can’t even do that right. I read other people post on a different subject group and it literally makes me sick thinking my story is like the people I’m reading about. I don’t want it to be but it does. I can’t even write about my issue because I’m ashamed or embarrassed about it. What makes me keep waking up is my friend I don’t want to disappoint her but what is going to happen when she dies. It’s pitaful when I can’t write about what is happening to me everyday to people who can’t see me. This is
Meds-wise and behavior-wise I seem to be on an even keel for the moment, praying every morning for strength to control myself and for alertness to be aware of those storm clouds brewing in the back of my mind so I can stop them before I open my mouth and let the bipolar monster out !
Im in the slow process of awaiting Social security disability. Im severely bipolar,have depression,anxiety,im basically a cluster fuck of mental illnesses. I live about 4 states away from my family with my fiance,Ive tried making friends but everyone wants to go out and do things that involve money,transportation and generally things that I have no access to. Ive made a few conversations with...