This has been going on forever now.. I need sleep. It is getting better.. It really is.. I was getting aobut 2 hours of sleep a day.. Now its up to 4.. I lay down and its like my mind becomes a story book and chapter after chapter is being written in my head.. Its getting very very old.. very very fast.. I went to bed last night.. Every intention of sleeping.. Went to bed at 9:30 was up at midnight.. determind to sleep i laid back down and was up 30 minutes later writing a novel in my head.. it is getting better though.. i'm less high.. still angry but less high.. stupid drs office was closed yesterday..
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...