I've been experencing really drastic highs and lows. I'm not sleeping so then i'm really tiered in the morning and i JUST CANT function. and i spend the whole day paranoid that someones watching me. But i find myself just being manic all day LONG. shopping spending any bit of money i got. by the time the evening comes i'm so damn depressed that i can't even bare to deal with my daughter. SHE"S only 2 i feel like i'm holding my breath till she goes to bed so that the pressure of her demands get releaved. But as soon as i try to go to bed it feels like my mind is on a speedway speeding so fast i can't even see what is going on. I'm getting scared because now when i'm laying there it's like a rush of addrenalin is rushing threw me and I feel jittery all over and it won't go away till I smoke a cigarret and I DON'T smoke. never did till now and it only takes half a ciggarete to make me light headed enoph to go to bed and MAYBE an hour later i'll get to sleep. THIS IS MY LIFE EVERY GOD DAMN DAY! why?
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...