It seems like everything in my life is going wrong. Sometimes I feel like God is punishing me and that I'm a bad person and deserve it. My doc is cutting me off of my disability pay, my husband and I are fighting- I think we had the worst fight ever yesterday. He grabbed and pushed me for the first time in 7 years. I do love him but I know he shouldn't have done that to me. I am dependent on him financially, since I lost my job back in Oct 06. They've tried me on so many meds and now finally Lithium, which seems to be working better. I have financial problems now also, and I feel like I'm trapped. I'm thinking of taking an OD, I burn myself sometimes also to punish myself. I want to scream out for someone to help me, but those around me have a deaf ear. My doc is an ___hole. I'm so tired of fighting with all of this.
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