whatever is going on with me right now is ruining my whole life. people are asking me where i went? whats happened to real me? and so on. my closest friend says i'm acting just britney spears and she cant keep watching me spiraling down so bye bye. today my mom said the same thing. she told me no one in my family can talk to me anymore because i'm so crazy. even she compared me to britney spears saying i'm acting just like her. my husband and i, well our relationship has just turned to shit. my kids are just so sweet and i'm afraid of even being around them in fear of damaging them. my pdoc has been messing around with me for two days regarding weaning off my meds. she refuses to fill the script for that and apparently today refuses to discuss all this confusion and fuzziness I have been feeling. i'm going to get fired because i didnt' make it to work for a few days and i'm gonna lose school too because i dont even know what the hell the teacher is talking about and i cant make sense of it because i feel like i'm intoxicated or something. and then she started talking about putting water in peoples lungs and how much that hurts. i just couldn't handle hearing that. i got all panicky and had to leave the room. so i ended up going home. i just honestly dont get what the hell is going on right now and nobody in my circle of friends, family, and mental health workers are willing to help me.
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