Ok, so I am a young woman whom is expecting a baby is 5 weeks. I am engaged to that childs father who has been recently diagnosed (by his PCP not the psych) as having BPD. I am probably the BEST person to deal with this issue. I am geting my masters in educational psychology and have years of experience in behavioral science and mental health. So, what I am trying to say is...I am willing to stand by this man and help him with this. The problem is that he doesn't take it seriously. He projects all of his problems onto everyone else (ex: I am this way because I was abandoned as a child, I earn the money and I should be able to spend it as I choose (in mass ammounts despite pending bills), just because you had an example of a good marraige in your parents doesnt mean I am going to know how to do it, I am not irritable--you just don't know how to accept me, and on and on). he refuses to take his meds regularly because he say "I got this far without them" or they make me sleepy (doesnt realize this wears off after a few weeks if he would take them regularly). So all this said...how do I stand by someone and support them when they don't see the need. I know I can't live with the constant insanity when the other person doesnt take ownership over it. I love this man, or the man he is when he is stable, and I just ache to help him reach that place where life feels normal...I want to keep my family together (we are having that baby and my older son calls him dad). but, I am so scared that, in the process, I will destroy myself as a woman and destroy my son's image of what a father and husband should be. Any suggestions?
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