Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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stopping triggers

deleted_user
deleted_user
i suffer from paranoia.ok let me explain my g/f won't make love to me rarely because she says she don't feel safe with me she is scared i will flip out.i have never flipped out while making love.
but this has made me paranoid that she might be seeing someone else.
she talks about this woman from work alot then said we both was going round this womans house for coffee i wasn't asked i was told.
anyway that was the same morning she came home with a soft toy(a microwave warmer)that this woman had given her then took it to bed with her that night refusing to remove it from the bed cos the smell from it was making me feel sick(i had a stomach bug).
i talked to her about my paranoia and how all this was triggering it off big time.she just said i wasn't going to stop her having friends and said she was still going round this workmates house for coffee whether i went or not.i see no comprimise at all with her.she even kept asking me if i had seen this soft toy that has gone missing and accussing me of taking it.
how do i make her relalize what she is doing to me mentally why won't she understand.i can't go on like this.she knows what is triggering me i've told her straight.please any advice?
deleted_user
deleted_user
bump
deleted_user
deleted_user
It's difficult to tell you what to do if you have already told her straight out that it's a trigger for you. Btw, did you take the toy? Have you communicted with her in any way that you feel she may be slipping away from you in certain areas? See what she says about that. She doesn't seem too responsive or understanding of your mental condition thus making it difficult to stop her from continuing to trigger you.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Some things you can control. You know that she has habits that are triggers. You need to avoid those triggers. If that means still dating her but sleeping in a different bed, then do that.

You can't make her understand anything. Plus this whole making love issue is totally her issue, not yours.

Sounds like she has triggers too? This is a harsh question, but is she worth it?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have bipolar and flipped out on my husband while making love. It hurt him so bad that it caused problems in our relationship. He thought there was something wrong with him. We solved my issue. But in your case you have never done anything wrong. Maybe she just needs some space. It sounds like she is having some sexual issues, and is blaming you for them, too. Don't hurt yourself by thinking it is something you are doing. She needs to work her problems out. If she can't understand you, it might be that she doesn't want to understand. Being open with her doesn't seem to be helping you.
deleted_user
deleted_user
umm I would bail, if she has no respect for you, it's time to go.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I think you need to rethink this relationship. Their are alot of caring, loving and easy going people out their. If she is triggering episodes and doesn't seem to care then I'd rethink my relationship. Call your pdoc and ask for some counseling on this. This illness requires that our support people understand us otherwise they aren't support for us. This is a difficult illness and not everyone can handle it. Maybe you're girlfriend is someone who can't handle it or just doesn't want to.
deleted_user
deleted_user
You can't make her understand she will in time. Pateince I know all to well that is hard as hell casue I have none. But in the long run things happen for a reason. If you love and care for her don't push her or try and make her understand. One suggestion has she gone to the pdr.s with you at all? The reason I ask is My boy friend goes everytime just to understand what is going on with me and in case I forget something to say he says it. For us it has worked. The reason I say don'tpush and make her understand is I have a 18 year old and I pushed her and tryed to make her understand and now its going on 3 months and she won't talk to me nor be in the same room as me. Good louck all the best and I hope this has worked. God bless
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