Things that I have done years ago still leave me paralyzed. I want to share them with people but they are just too awful. Things that I did when I was manic and 19. 20 wasn't so bad and 21 wasn't too bad either, but when I was 19 I really let loose and did somethings that I really regret that I can't stand and can't let out of my head, or heart. I wish that they would just disappear from my memory and I am wondering if the feelings of regret get any better. I feel that I could have lived happily ever after if I didn't, say, break up with my last girlfriend. I regret it because I know what I'm missing out on. I miss it so much. I miss the affection, I miss the relief that I don't have to look for anyone, I miss the feeling of wellbeing that I might have someone to share my life with. Now all I do is spend time with my parents. I can't even find real guy friends that don't want to drink all the time. It's getting really depressing and I don't know why. I sit around and ask my self simply "why" and I don't know. I just don't know. I have dreams that I'm getting in trouble with the police and I don't know why.
Posts You May Be Interested In
I miss traveling with my husband. Has anyone found a specific site regarding cruising for widow/widowers or any sightseeing trips. Not interested in being with couples and kids,,,I realize a cruise ship will have a portion size of families and couples, but perhaps they also put together a part of the cruise ship for groups of widows/widowers????
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...