I went to see pdoc again today and was informed my diagnosis has been "upgraded" to BP I. Yay! (note the sarcasm). I guess BPIIs aren't supposed to get quite so manic and paranoid when they are on mood stabilizers and anti-psychotics. I'm still pretty depressed at the moment but DH and I had a nice talk yesterday and I feel like he's being a little more supportive than he was. He went with me to the doctor today and is going with me to the therapist on Wed. I think I'm definitely in need of some therapy. At least I'm no longer considering swallowing a bottle of pills to get people's attention and convince them I'm very depressed. I sort of hoped they'd up my anti-depressant today but I guess since I've felt marginally better yesterday and today they're not going to tinker with the dose for fear of making me manic again. Anyhow, I'll quit rambling now...
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??