Hi, I am 25 female. Me and my gf have recently broken up. She broke it off with me. She is 27 and has bipolar. I have OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder), Anxiety, and Depression. We were together nearly 4 years. We had problems off and on between my OCD and her bipolar. She wanted a fairy tale relationship and I was living with my problem but I went and got help for her! I now go to a therapist once every other week and to a psychiatrist once a month. She kept saying for a long time I need medicine. So it was a struggle to get her to call a doctor, when she finally did the doctor put her on Welbutrin. She at first said that is seemed like it was helping and then a month later she said the medicine isn\'t helping and was starting to get really down again. She refused to go back to the doctor after only seeing this doctor once, because she said the doctor was not friendly enough. I told her she should give her a second chance and by me saying that or trying to get her to go back to that doctor she thought I was trying to control her. She has yet to call another doctor even though she has insurance and she keeps saying I need help, I don\'t know who I am, I need to see a psychiatrist. Well we also had other relationship problems....it was hard for her to handle my OCD sometimes, and we got in arguments sometimes (which I believe is normal) but like I said she wanted a \"perfect relationship\". I also wanted to live in the past (which I realize is wrong and there is no reason to live in the past, it was just part of my problem like I tried to explain to her), and I called her a bitch and a slut a couple of times (which I felt sorry for and told her sometimes people say and do things they don\'t mean)...she also has called me names before but I let it go. She said she felt like I wasn\'t there for her as a partner, I didn\'t treat her how she wanted to be treated....like since of my OCD and anxiety the last few years of our relationship I wasn\'t cuddling as much, I couldn\'t sleep at night so I\'d stay up on the computer instead of going to bed with her at night. I kinda talked her not going out and doing things with people or just the two of us. I kinda forced her not to talk to people because I am so introverted and an only child and always have been shy because of my problem that I just didn\'t understand. So therefore when she broke up with my (which was abruptly even though she said she has given me chances, which she did, but sometimes she said that was just to scare me so I\'d act how she wanted me to and sometimes she would hint around) she told me I broke her heart and that she can\'t give me another chance right now because her heart is closed. So she moved in with someone she works with. The thing is, is that she comes to see me once or sometimes twice a week on her days off. She talks to me or text messages me almost everynight on the phone. But when I ask her about us she says she doesn\'t know and she is confused and she needs help and needs time. She said the only way I\'d be able to open her heart back up is if I \"propose\" myself kinda like an advertisement to show her I really have changed. I told her I have changed that is was just my problems I was dealing with and I was living in the past and the last 3 weeks since she\'s been gone I\'ve had time to think of my mistakes on how I treated her sometimes and how silly it is to live in the past. She tells me all the time I don\'t know why you didn\'t change before when I wanted you to. I told her I think God did it to teach me patience and make me realize the things I do wrong. When she left she hung out with this other girl she said she kinda liked at first and told me she kissed her on the lips. Then a few days later she texted me and told me that girl was a selfish f*** and no friend and blah blah blah but she was drinking that night. That night she also told me she wanted us and another job (she really doesn\'t like her job and is really depressed about it). Then a week later she said she still talks to that girl on the phone and texts her because she feels sorry for her and feels like she needs a lesbian friend and that she feels sorry for that girl because she doesn\'t believe in God. I told her that she shouldn\'t just hang out with someone because they are lesbian like us. I told her that girl is not her responsibility. Well a few days later she told me that girl was mean to her and said something rude cuz she was drunk and then my girls friend who she lives with and works with called that girl up and said don\'t be mean to her she doesn\'t need a friend like you. So my girl continued to talk to her until a few days ago when she said don\'t worry I want nothing to do with that girl, she is crazy. Then yesterday she told me she told that girl it\'s over, not to bother her anymore cuz she was stressing my girl out. Then my girl told me that, that girl came over the girls house she lives with last night at midnight, drunk and was acting stupid talking nonsense and was over there for like 10 minutes. My girl calls me a lot at night and I help her fall asleep cuz she feels calmed by my voice. Well after I talked to her last night, I was talking and I was really depressed and she feel asleep and I kept saying her name and she\'d say huh? then I would repeat the question I kept asking her. Well I kinda raised my voice a little so she could hear me. Then I finally hung up cuz she wouldn\'t answer me no more period. So then I tried calling back to say goodbye and see if she was coming to see me the next day. No response in the morning or all day or all night but I seen she called people cuz I seen the minutes go up on the phone. I kept texting her and asking her why she\'s mad at me and all that and she just won\'t answer. She even just come spent Christmas and Christmas Eve with me and my family and had a good time. She tells me to Be Patient all the time. My question is, is what does Be Patient mean? Why all of a sudden today won\'t she text me back? What do I do to help her? How do I make her realize how much I love her and miss her without pushing her further away? Please help!!!!!
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??