I don't have a child who has gone through this but as a married person who went through this myself, I know how my husband stood by me for a year until I got straightened out. I had no drug addictions or infidelty though. Just give her unconditional love and try to educate yourself about the disorder. Try to get her a child psychologist if you can, they seem to best with teens, as far as I can tell. When she is stabilized and accepts the diagnosis she will probably turn around. You may want to talk to MHA (mentalhealthadvocate) or veritas about this subject. They are two people on this board who may have some insight.

Also talk to AlwaysTired, she is the parent of a child with BP. I'm sorry that is all I can offer.

i can only talk for your daughter's perspective..and would like to hear more about what she is like...

but...you need to keep reminding yourself that this is physiological...she does not mean what she says all the time-or at times her meanings are amplified...

she may try to find reasons in her childhood to blame...because it is difficult when you can't understand why you have certain disturbing emotions with no concrete reason...

the louder more upset she gets...the more quiet and calm you need to be

tell her that there is nothing she is thinking that makes her a bad person...tell her she can tell you anything...and mean it...

write down a journal of her emotions so you can bring it to the doctor...

and consider family counseling...
please let me know more information about her

This disease is biologically based, much the same as diabetes or heart disease, only it is SO much more misunderstood because there is no test or "proof." It is important that your daughter understand (from you) that what she is going through is NOT her fault and that there is help out there, and that she will get better with your support, a good doctor, the right meds., awareness, etc. I agree with what the others are saying. Be patient. It is so hard in the beginning and you must be going through such a range of emotions, but please don't feel guilty because none of this is your fault either. Education is key - read everything out there on-line and in the book stores. "The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression" by Andrew Solomon, and "Surviving Manic Depression" by Torrey and Knable are two great resources. I would also recommend looking into support groups in your area. They are often set up so that both people with bp, and their loved ones, can get support within their own groups. Finally, "Dr. Ivan's Depression Central" is a great web resource -very thorough:
www.psycom.net/depression.central.html
Best of luck to you and your family. you will get through this.

My kids are not Bipolar but ADHD, the thing that helps the most is finding a good family therapist for ALL of you to visit since you all have issues. Her parenting advice was particularly helpful and my boys got there say in when they told me I don't spend enough time with them.

My parents and my sis struggled alot when she was a teen. My prents were so angry at her behavior that they couldn't see she was actually sick. They just thought she was rebelling. I am glad to see your daughter is diagnosed. Patients is important and don't give up. Always look for help when needed.

i am a parent of 2 bp kids and am bp myself and the best thing that i have done for myself is to absorb as much info as i can get my hands on.it took about 6mths before my youngest sonsmeds started to work so i was able to start narrowing down which behavior was learned and which was his bp.day to day is a diffrent conflict with my teenage son i am able to somewhat understand his frustration with himself as to why his is the way he is and do believe that this is going to be his biggest problem to except that this is who he is.in talking with him i learned that he shared many of my frustrations with myself and that he wants to be normal.personal judgement is one of the worst things to get passed i am not sure if anyone of us can ever do that.as a teen he is already going through so many changes that he already deals with,and of course trying to fit in and be "normal" keeps him agitated and just plain pissed off.something that helped our communication was we started a journal that only we write in.he can write ANYTHING in it.i willthen respond to it only in the journal we never discuss anything that either one of us has written outside of the journal.i have since realized how hard it was for him to share his feelings with me and this made it so much easier for him to know that he never had to actually say the words out loud.it is hard for many of us to share our feelings and thoughts with people but as a teen i can only imagine.parents are the enemy!!i hope that something that i have written will help,it has helped me and my son,slowly he is starting to come around and feel as though he can trust me with his feelings and thoughts without the journal.GOODLUCK!!!you all will be in my thoughts and prayers..

Hey Countrychick,
I know the land of which you speak. I came to this site to get an education and help myself cope with parenting a teenage daughter with BP. You can learn a lot by just reading here, and asking questions. But the day to day is another thing all together. Feel free to send me a message and we can talk. I don't like to post too much of my daughter's story here, since it is her private story, but I'm glad to try and help through messaging. Good luck!

And one thought...my daughter has started to go through good times (like 4 or 5 months in a row) now that she is 18. So there is hope. And also, look at all these wonderful, wildly creative people on this site. It can feel like a blessing. Well, almost.....

I am a bipolar and mother to a 19-yr-old son who is bipolar, more noticeably so than I am. No one in my family/friends listened to me and helped me when I was raising him - they said "oh, he's just a boy". We didn't have money for doctors and by the time I decided to try to be strong and get help he was old enough to fight me or run away.
My advice to you is to force her to STICK WITH TREATMENT while she's still a minor - You may go to sleep each night hurting but you should know you're protecting her from herself.

I hope she eventually listens and stays with medication. And gets the right treament. My son is in jail now and has no idea why I can't help him. I wouldn't wish the last 8 years of my life on ANYONE.

You likely have a NAMI support group in your area? Check the internet to see - they are very good; just a bunch of family members and loved ones of bipolars, trying to understand how to help and to get emotional support from others like themselves. I'm praying for you -