ARe there any possibilities with the parents you haven't heard from that they will allow their kids to come? I would stress how important it is for your son. I'm not sure what else to say. I went thru this as a kid because I didn't have a mom & now I believe parents sensed my dad was "off" & wouldn't allow their kids around him or me (please don't take that as a comparison to you, only a memory of childhood where many times, no one came to the party & I was very disappointed).

Yes, there are a few of them that I haven't heard from. His last 2 parties had almost full attendance from his class and he was so happy. This year, some of his best friends aren't going to be there. I just feel so bad for him and the anger is just building up.

Don't worry about comparing, I do think that the other parents feel that there is something "off" with me, they seem to be as uncomfortable with me as I am with them.

I am going to take a small dose of Xanax because I feel an anxiety attack coming on and the rage is building. Thanks for the quick response VAlC!

I doubt you are as "off" as my dad. He was physically abusive and I think the neighbors told the church who told the others who told the school (but in those days, noone rescued kids, they just avoided you). I hope you can get some kids there. Funny, I was just thinking about how empty my childhood days had been. And may I ask, what is Asperger's?

try not to take it too personal. as long as he has fun and enjoys his party it doesn't matter if he has the whole class or only a few close friends. sometimes it just gets to be too much on parent's with children in school because there is so much to get done. could you imagine how hectic things would be and how expensive it would get if you went to every person B-day party during the year. i couldn't do it! Cheers to the one that can! i really mean that. Not to mention, i've noticed as they are starting out, you are so full of gust and energy, willing to do anything and so active with it all, then you realize that this is going to be for the next 12 years and you have to slow down a bit to keep the pace and stay in the race, maybe this is what you're noticing instead of them snubbing you?

No, I have been able to maintain pretty good control of things as far as what the other parents and school staff see.

Asperger's is a form of autism. Christian is very high functioning, but he doesn't grasp nuances of social interaction, has speech issues and he is just different from the other kids. He has the sweetest little heart which is what makes this so hard. He also has a hard time with his motor skills so his teacher lets him type his test answers on a computer some of the time.

Anyway, he is doing really well otherwise. I just want his party to be special, you know? I'm so sorry you had so many no-shows to your parties when you were a kid, why do people have to be so darn judgmental?

Thanks for the reply Anishals, I think that the reason this is bugging me is that it is very out of character for the other kids' parents. He only has 15 other kids in his class and most of the birthday parties have full attendance or maybe 1 or 2 kids who don't come, so this definitely stands out as unusual.

I really hope that I am overreacting, but I think there is some measure of reality that is not positive and it makes me very upset.

also remember, time is what shows you who you're true friends are, there won't be ones that stick around forever in any relationship, other's will come and go, but the one's that stick around are the only ones you'll want for you special little boy, those are the one's that will truly deserve to see the wonderful heart he has inside!

Thank you Anishals, I had not looked at it from that perspective. You're right, if these people are this snobbish, why would I want them or their children to be an influence on my son?

That's a great point.

i'm glad i could ease you a bit!

Thank you for explaining your son's condition (I didn't want to get off the site & go to the online dictionary). Sounds like a beautiful soul trapped by a body that won't let him express himself. I think anishals shed some light on things that I didn't think of. I just hate to see kids hurt or disappointed. I hope more come through...

I have/had a son with ahhd, pretty obvious. It was hard for him around birthdays..But remeber this..I told him a party takes two and his very best friends were there. Is it hard, Yes, But sometimes I think it is harder on us parents than the kids. All you do is make the party fun. He will be fine. And Mom? the rest of those kids don't know what they are missing. so you and your son and his friends...enjoy!@!!!!

Thank you humminbirdsarefree, I can tell that you have been through the same thing. I am going to focus on making it really cool for the kids who do show up!!!

yqw..I hope you all have a good time