ok quick story i was 16 when i was diagnoised with bipolar disorder i had a black out when i came to i was laing in a ditch with a butchers knife in my back pocket an sore all over with cuts an bruises i started to walk till i came to my street when i got to my street the where cops every where an helicopters every where as well when i almost got to my drive way i was taken down by police an handcuff . on my way to some where the cop had told me what i did i had got mad at my mom for not wanting to take me to the store she left me home an the cop said after that they dont know what happened except for the fact every thing in my house was destroed think i'm kidding not i broke every thing possible windows ,glass,antiques,i sliced fruniture i through the fridge on the ground cut the cords ripped doors off hinges well it look like there was a tornado that my moms house the cop said since i could not remember any thing that there was some thing wrong with me an he had made the descion for my mom not to take me to jail an took me to my first mental health place (thecrazy house) i was left in there for 3 months my first time when the doc threaten my to put me in foster care my mom quickly came an got me that is when she decide to up my dosage to 1500mg depokote an zoloft to 500mg i was completely lost in myself for 2 years finally my dad had got hurt an spent more time at home an realized what my mom was doing so he cut me off told me there was nothing wrong an told me never take the med's agin then when i had kids my mom had dcf step an take my kids she had proved me unfit cause i did not want to take the meds agin i was told if i ever want my kids back i had to get back on them well i wanted to make sure if i was going to take them i wanted to be in controll of myself and able tobe ready for not cause some body was making me now that i am 24 almost 25 i am tring to get what i need they put me on that lamictal an prozac then to zoloft an they where not working so i would tell the doc it that they where making me worse so they would up my doseage an send me to another doc after 3 doc's i said u have to take me off this its not working i need some thing else she called me a drug user i just wanted the med's for to get high i said no an tried to explain what was going on every thing i have said here an she put me back on the depakote an zoloft i told her i did not want to be on that stuff because when i took it ,it made me suicidel an the depakote was not working any more any ways but she did not want to hear me next month i have to go see her what do i do its just not working an next month will be the 3 month i have been taking it an its doing what i said it was an they say if i feel suicidel i should baker act myself but i cant do that when i am going back an forth for court an theres nobody on my side i just feel like everyone is aganst me ecept for my hubby what do i do an on top of it all the doc said 2 months ago that i was manic bipolar an split personality disorder which my hubby an his family disagree with so my question is what do i do about the doctor an every thing. i mean i have asked for another doc an i have filled complaints but it is not doing any thing
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