My name is Cory and I am 24 and trying to live life without ruining. So far I am doing a horrible job. I have bipolar disorder and it seems to get worse. My medications seem to have stopped working and I am turning to cutting, alcohol, starving myself, shopping binges (charging and charging) and trashing everything around me. I am in therapy, but I have known my psychiatrist so long I don't think she helps me at all. I have a fiance and tons of family who loves me and wants to help, but I just don't think they get the whole concept of what I am going through. Sometimes I do feel I should be institutionalized so my meds can be monitored and I can get the proper health, but then I don't want to be away from my fiance and family. I am trying desperatly to get a degree in early childhood education. I have been in college since 2001 and my BPD is making it extremely hard as I have to withdrawal constantly. I know that I need to get better if I want to take care of children and teach them, if I want to live a happy life with my fiance and get married. Things are piling on and I am hurting myself and afraid I am slowly killing myself. I am reaching out for help and need friends who can understand what I am going through. Please...SOS! I am scared!
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