Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
The Psychiatric Hotline
Hello. Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Please stay on the line until we can trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, please listen carefully until the voices tell you which number to press.
If you are borderline, it doesn't matter which number you press-- no one will answer.
If you are manic-depressive, please press 7 as fast as you can for the next 24 hours, and then crash for the following 24 hours.
If you have bipolar affective disorder, please leave a message after the beep and before the beep and after the beep.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All operators are too busy to talk to you.
If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.
If you have ADD, wander away from the phone and start another task.
If you suffer from generalized anxiety disorder, please fidget with the pound key until a representative comes on the line.
If you suffer from social phobia, please hang up and go to a party.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, telephone, and mother's maiden name.
If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, s-l-o-w-l-y & c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y press 0 0 0.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
Thank you for calling the Psychiatric Hotline.
Hello. Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Please stay on the line until we can trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, please listen carefully until the voices tell you which number to press.
If you are borderline, it doesn't matter which number you press-- no one will answer.
If you are manic-depressive, please press 7 as fast as you can for the next 24 hours, and then crash for the following 24 hours.
If you have bipolar affective disorder, please leave a message after the beep and before the beep and after the beep.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All operators are too busy to talk to you.
If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.
If you have ADD, wander away from the phone and start another task.
If you suffer from generalized anxiety disorder, please fidget with the pound key until a representative comes on the line.
If you suffer from social phobia, please hang up and go to a party.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, telephone, and mother's maiden name.
If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, s-l-o-w-l-y & c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y press 0 0 0.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
Thank you for calling the Psychiatric Hotline.
-
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
-
I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
ROFL (but being VERY careful for those who worry!!!)
Yet, I still know I've seen it all before too.