I'm bpII leaning towards depression...so the past few months have been very perplexing to me. I have been taking 200mg of Lamictal for a little over a year and I went to my pdoc yesterday stating that I didn't think it was working anymore because in the past few months I have been doing something I call "going on a tear" where I get really revved up and then I start drinking and the night always ends up with me getting into a terrible fight with the guy I'm seeing...I say terrible things that I don't even remember saying (or feeling)...I really let him have it! And I have gotten physical a few times too( and all the while I feel very justified in what I am doing--its so weird!!)..ugh..this is SO embarrassing! It just dawned on me last week that this may be Mania!!! Duh!! I'm just not used to this side of bp! My pdoc asked if I was getting depressed at all and (another revelation) I said NO! It's odd for me not to get down so that's a good thing! He thinks the Lamictal is working in that respect and increased it to 300mg and if that doesn't somehow calm me down he wants me to try Invega. I guess the reason I'm posting is cuz I've never really experienced mania like this...the upside is I do really well at work and stuff but it's like I have this little idget inside me that wants to come out and reak mischeif and havoc!!
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