Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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My outpatient treatment just ended (insurance says I'm all better!..ya, I'm being sarcastic). My short term disabilty runs out on 11/15. Got a letter for work saying I have to be out of work til then and they have to let me leave for therapy (groups and individual).
But I don't want to go back to my old job and am looking for something else. But truthfully, I feel like I'm not "all here". Like I'm living in some other non-reality. I think it may be from the stress of finding a new job with no support at all from my DH. He just thinks I'm lazy and don't want to work which is not true. I feel like I'm living in a fantasy world, like I'm disassociating. My marriage is falling apart, my DH is abusive and I think this is a coping mechanism??
What do I do? Help!
But I don't want to go back to my old job and am looking for something else. But truthfully, I feel like I'm not "all here". Like I'm living in some other non-reality. I think it may be from the stress of finding a new job with no support at all from my DH. He just thinks I'm lazy and don't want to work which is not true. I feel like I'm living in a fantasy world, like I'm disassociating. My marriage is falling apart, my DH is abusive and I think this is a coping mechanism??
What do I do? Help!
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try for SSDI. after you get it leave him bi polar is bad enough as it is. you take care of you....
Maybe you will get lucky and this time not work for a long time.
I am I disassociating, Yes, But i am disassociated, I haven't chosen it. Job problems overwhelming, marriage issues same, insurance, SSI, all that other stuff the same. Can I deal YES and I am. Do I like it or look at it all through rose colored glasses. No mine are tinted very dark gray. I mean BP has the highest suicide rate of all, ALL mental illnesses 15-19% approx. Do I feel it not today not on meds. But is is on my mind all the time. If the meds don't work and I quit. I go suddenly manic. I need to disassociate, at least right now. I have learned people will nod there heads at what you tell them like they understand and don't, so forget the stuff that you can't even share. Sick dark thoughts, just pop in there. Being able to express theories of life and struggle and love and pain in your head but not being able to remeber on your own everyday to take meds at certain times, Dr. Appts. that you wrote down and called the day before about, or even what day of the week it is. Which by the way doesn't even matter because it is just one more day of trying to fix my problems or take a course of action that makes them worse.
WHoa! I started out to be encouraging and guess got pissed along the way.
Anyways I can relate. I hope you wake up tomorrow and you feel totally normal.
Alicia, that sounds like a good plan except my damn husband will go apesh**. I know I should just do what's right for me and in the end I know I will but it's just a little harder with him not backing me up. Argh! BTW, I am presently on short term disability. I suppose I could try to go to long term...I've had it extended once already.
I don't see things getting too much better if you and your husband can't get to a better place. This illness is hard enough without having the added stress of being in an abusive relationship.
Try to get him educated as to just what you (and he) are dealing with. Once he learns what the life of a Bipolar consists of, he may react differently.
If he shows no interest in becoming part of the solution rather than the problem, then perhaps you will be better off without him.
I know that sounds flip and easy to say, but I speak from personal experience.
I'm truly sorry for the hard time you are now going through. I hope your mood shifts to a happier one soon!!!
Take care!!!
He shows no interest in learning about Bipolar. So I guess there's no hope for us.