Or anything you can offer. I'm feeling "weird" today. Kinda really angry actually. not even sure why. I've been up and down for months with very little "normal" time in between. My whole mood, emotion, and everything can change about me in weeks. So today I wonder. Am I really bipolar? Ofcourse my pdoc says I am. And ofcourse I truly like her and respect her. But is she right? How would I know? What if I'm just borderline? Borderline closely mimicks bipolar. And what if its that? Borderline isn't treatable and dosn't really need meds. So what if I"m borderline and dont really need to be on these meds. I'm angry today. I have no real reason other than the fact that for the past few weeks, I have finally stabled out. I was feeling normal and rational and with a clear head. I got back into school, was managing that, my kids, and work. Doing just dandy and feeling just fine. And suddenly out of nowhere, my good mood goes away. My head starts to get fuzzy and I start to get really pissed off at everyone and everything. I start finding it nesseccary to clarify every point LIKE TEN TIMES because I think people are not understanding what the hell I said the first time. I want to go. go somewhere but I dont know where i want to go. I just want to go away. I dont want to go to work, or school, or be a mother, but I dont want to sit home and do nothing either. I want to go. I feel angry and pissy and have been just a complete bitch to everyone in sight and almost feel kind of smug about it. I want to tell a few people in my life to go fuck themselves and I'm just feeling weird. I cant explain it. So what the hell is this? Why am I so mad? What the hell is wrong with me? Give me advice, support, or tell me I'm a dam idiot. I dont care, just tell me what you think.
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...