Eve it's inevitable that we are going to hurt each other, that's what we do best. Please yourself and stand strong,'cause I don't see anyway around it, except to become a complete recluse.

I have felt like this too.I think that we are so sensitive and over analyze everything and everybody and that is why we tend to be more open to hurt.Things that do not really bother others can crush us.

After reading some of the replies to your post yesterday, I believe ppl where advising on how not to feel hurt or disapointed all the time, especially if you are prown to that nature. We must always strive to live abundantly and that involves taking the risk of disapointment and let down. Some of us are to sensitive to hurt and therefore advisable to stay clear of situations that my cause it. If we lower our expectations of others then we can only be pleasantly surprised when thet exceed, kids , mates, friends, neighbors, etc. Maybe just a readjustment of bounderies and relistic expectaions of friends and loved ones. Something we all need to do from time to time.

in order to live you have to get hurt... you need emotions... but it's just how much can people take....

It depends on what you are speaking of in the way of hurt. It is a very deep and difficult subject. I work on loving myself and knowing my value. Being confident of who I am by being the best I can be. If I do that, I rarely get hurt. However, when I was younger, I allowed everything and everybody to hurt me in some way through my emotions. I was not a strong person. Now, if I have given my best and offered the gifts I have nurtured, I cant be hurt in a permanent fashion. That is not to say that people havent hurt my feelings, but usually when I meditate on that, I realize it was my own emotion that hurt me not the other person. There are some situations where others want to hurt us because of who they are, we cannot control that other than to know we have given our best. If it wasnt good enough, we move on and brush it off. I always evaluate where the hurt is coming from. Hugs

I have become an introvert because of people hurting me but then again I've always been told that I am overly sensitive, maybe it's because of the bp. It's hard for me not to shut people out, it's hard for me to reach out to people so I isolate. It's me who is missing out on life, I can relate, it is soooo... hard to change when fear is ruling our lives. I try everyday to walk through the fear of being hurt again because I truly don't want to be alone in this world. Realize that other's are afraid too and that we are all doing our best and don't have to be perfect. We must remain true to ourselves during this brief lifespan or we will strongly regret it later in life. I wish you the best and could totally relate to what you wrote.

What do you mean, particularly, by havng too much expectation?



I don't think there is a fine line there.....being disappointed by your unfulfilled expectations of others (we all have those) is VERY painful...and shutting down, is an unhealthy response to that.

The trick is, to realize what is going on before you have those expectations, and catch yourself, and don't have those expectations to begin with.

That is the difference between being controlling (either passively or agrressively) and having a neutral balance in the middle. (being assertive)

For instance, if you have a daughter (who shall remain nameless) who you keep txt'ing and sending letters and emails to, and she doesn't respond to them, and you get angry and hurt before you find out why, and then find out she has been swamped at work, and has had problems with her boyfriend, and health problems she has been afraid to talk about, you can get yourself right out of position to give her the very help and support she needs.

Or, if you get stiffed by your son, (who shall remain nameless also) and you thought he was going to stay with you while he was on leave, and you wind up being his taxi to the mother-in-law-from-hell's house and he only stays with you one day, and you still haven't found out why, you could either A. Get mad and never talk to him again. or B. Stay available, knowing there was a mis-understanding, and think about what happened in the mis-communication, and make sure you clarify better next time.

See the difference? This is very difficult to learn, but it can make ALL the difference in the world.