Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
Hello everyone,
I just wanted to introduce myself as a noob to your site. I have found you all by accident and I hope you are all what I am looking for.
Let me tell you a little bit about myself: sorry if I rant or you get board - I need an outlet right now.
I am 24, in a committed relationship of 6 years and have a 20 month old daughter. I love my daughter and boyfriend very much but lately my boyfriend and I have had some relationship problems and things were quickly swirling down the tubes. About 4 weeks ago we finally hashed it all out and experienced the death and re-birth of our relationship. That seemed to have been a breaking point for me.
The day after our "re-birth" we went to my PCM for an appt I had scheduled months ago for depression. I held nothing back and let her have it all, the depression and what I feel is a clinical eating disorder (compulsive eating). She started me right away on Prozac and scheduled a one week follow up.
I didn't quite make it a week before I felt I was getting worse, started having panic attacks and my depression was worsening. PCM switched me to Lexapro (to help with the anxiety too) After a week on Lexapro (2 weeks on anti-depressants total) I completely lost it. I began having episodes where I wold black out, start to have bouts of paranoia and started scratching myself as a form of SI. I went back to my Dr (after being evaluated by a mental health clinic) and she immediately stopped the anti-depressants and put me on 1000mg of Depakote and sent me for an emergency eval to a psychiatrist. By this time we were suspecting bipolar II and after two hours with the psychiatrist yesterday he confirmed it. Rapid-Cycling Bipolar II. He prescribed my Zyprexa to take with my Depakote and I am off work for who knows how much longer.
I am about to loose the best job I have ever had (have not been there a year, not protected by FMLA) cannot afford to live off of disability and my poor boyfriend is going crazy and driving me crazy as well. He doesn't know what to do and it is only making me worse.
I cannot sleep - I am also taking 25mg of Ambien and that combined with the Ativan and Depakote is not knocking my butt out.
I am having bouts of paranoia and seeing shadows that are freaking me out, things dont look normal and I have this general sense of worry.
I am scared I am going crazy and loosing my family all at once.
Somebody please help me.
I just wanted to introduce myself as a noob to your site. I have found you all by accident and I hope you are all what I am looking for.
Let me tell you a little bit about myself: sorry if I rant or you get board - I need an outlet right now.
I am 24, in a committed relationship of 6 years and have a 20 month old daughter. I love my daughter and boyfriend very much but lately my boyfriend and I have had some relationship problems and things were quickly swirling down the tubes. About 4 weeks ago we finally hashed it all out and experienced the death and re-birth of our relationship. That seemed to have been a breaking point for me.
The day after our "re-birth" we went to my PCM for an appt I had scheduled months ago for depression. I held nothing back and let her have it all, the depression and what I feel is a clinical eating disorder (compulsive eating). She started me right away on Prozac and scheduled a one week follow up.
I didn't quite make it a week before I felt I was getting worse, started having panic attacks and my depression was worsening. PCM switched me to Lexapro (to help with the anxiety too) After a week on Lexapro (2 weeks on anti-depressants total) I completely lost it. I began having episodes where I wold black out, start to have bouts of paranoia and started scratching myself as a form of SI. I went back to my Dr (after being evaluated by a mental health clinic) and she immediately stopped the anti-depressants and put me on 1000mg of Depakote and sent me for an emergency eval to a psychiatrist. By this time we were suspecting bipolar II and after two hours with the psychiatrist yesterday he confirmed it. Rapid-Cycling Bipolar II. He prescribed my Zyprexa to take with my Depakote and I am off work for who knows how much longer.
I am about to loose the best job I have ever had (have not been there a year, not protected by FMLA) cannot afford to live off of disability and my poor boyfriend is going crazy and driving me crazy as well. He doesn't know what to do and it is only making me worse.
I cannot sleep - I am also taking 25mg of Ambien and that combined with the Ativan and Depakote is not knocking my butt out.
I am having bouts of paranoia and seeing shadows that are freaking me out, things dont look normal and I have this general sense of worry.
I am scared I am going crazy and loosing my family all at once.
Somebody please help me.
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
I know little comfort. I can tell you warm baths and holding your daughter and listening to her breathe may help you. I did that with my kids. I barely put down my kids til the age of three when me holding them was out till nappy time. I still use my six year old in the morning and at night I move him to his bed after he falls asleep with me singing to him and I wake him and take him to my bed for a morning snuggle before he goes to school my two older kids 13 and 12 still get night time and morning snuggle time too. It does help with the depression and creates a strong bond.
As for the shadows I only just started experiencing those I am wildly manic right now.
I am here if you want to talk. I sent you a hug earlier letting you know I am here. I was your age when Dx'ed and it does get better and then it gets worse kinda like New England weather!!!
Peace Love and Light
-B
Next, see your pdoc and explain to him/her what is happening. He/she may offer suggestions. Next, you hang on to the rollercoaster and make the best of it!
Take care!
You are having a lot of different symptoms. I think you need to give the meds some time to level out in your system.
I suggest you call your therapist or pdoc and tell all the things that are goign on and that you need help.
We are listening to you and lots of us can relate. I myself have suffered similar things such as the shadows and so many other types of symptoms it's an endless list. Once the meds stabilize you'll most likely have less of those symptoms.