Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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deleted_user
deleted_user
The people you shout at.The ones we complain of.Your family, friends etc..

Do you look at them at other times, when they are unaware...and get
overwhelmed with the strangest deepest sensation of mixed love and guilt and worry etc.Like from your core.From somewhere deep inside that wracks you in pain/love/confusion ? Moments that destroy you ?

I do

Do you ?
deleted_user
deleted_user
No, because my whole family is crazy.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I do. Everyone Lies, and Everyone has something they hide. When I see someone, like at school even if I don't know them well, I imagine what their life at home is like and realize there are soo many things that we don't know about the people we think we know the most. I get overwhelmed with thoughts all the time, there's just soo many questions that can never have answers.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Ditto, the entire family on my fathers side is nuts.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Just me then !! * whistles and walks off screen *
deleted_user
deleted_user
To deep for me tonight!
deleted_user
deleted_user
" How Deep Is Your Post !? " The Bee Pees !!
Hahaha
deleted_user
deleted_user
I do Pluck, in those moments it is heartbreaking, painful to think of the hurt I've caused whether I meant to or not. When I let down my guard and look at my family as human beings, just like everyone else, flaws and all. They have still loved me like no others. I owe them so much, yet most times I can't bring myself to expain this to them. I get frustrated and at times it comes out opposite of how I really feel.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Seriously, Pluck. No one in my life suffers more from my disease than I do. I isolate myself to pretty much ensure that. I married someone who is as obnoxious as I am to ensure it.

Otherwise, yeah, I would.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Yes, Pluck.
Sometimes I look at my mother & I just cry from the inside. I feel torn in half when I think of all the pain I have caused her. She didn't deserve any of that. She is the one who brought me in to the world & then she was there to save me from trying to take myself out of this world on more than one occasion. I can't imagine what that must have felt like for her.
deleted_user
deleted_user
To answer your question: no
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have a friend that i have very mixed feelings for because of the stuff that occurred during my mania, and her part in it... but something always draws me back,,, because i can never be the one to push someone away for good,, I'm always the one pushed... Not sure if that had anything to do with what u meant, but i do look at her sometimes... and wish i either liked her or didnt.. sick of the mixed feelings...
deleted_user
deleted_user
i think i suffer from that pain more than any other. i always hurt the people i love most. i push them away and try to make them hate me. then i think of them and remember how much beauty and love they have brought into my life. it breaks me because i know i'll just hurt them worse next time.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Jupey already responded as I wished too, Most eloquently too I might add.No point in repeating the same view.
storiesmom
storiesmom
That's a hard question. Like looking at your 80 year old father. Sort of questioning your exsistance on this earth? Or playing with your oown mind when you look at your child and think paranoid thoughts, just try not to go there.
deleted_user
deleted_user
you wouldn't catch me complaining about my people. Hell no.
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