Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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I like my mania. I get things done. I don't question myself. I'm awesome. I'm invincible. This is how I've described my manic episodes to people: So, try and think about the last time you had a really good day.. From the moment you woke up everything just went your way. I think most everyone can relate to this. Do you remember how you felt? I think most everyone would say that they felt great; better than great. Invincible, maybe? An overwhelming feeling of greatness or grandeur? For that particular day, nothing could go wrong and you can do no wrong, right? Again, I'm sure most everyone can relate to this feeling. That's how my manic episodes are like but mulitiplied times 10 and when I wake up the next morning the feeling is still there and I can't control it or stop it. That doesn't really sound that bad to have that feeling of greatness all the time. Some people would just think I have really high self esteem. So I ride this wave for however long it lasts. But it is exhausting and then you start to believe that you are not just better than everyone else, but above everyone else, and that's where it gets bad. You start wondering why aren't people recognizing how wonderful I am? Then reality hits or something, I still can't pinpoint what it is that brings me down but it does. I'm not great. I'm not wonderful. I'm not better than everyone. I'm nobody. I'm nothing.
I'm so exhausted...sick of this...up and down and constantly thinking and analyzing...I wish I could sleep like everyone else...I have all the same questions as everyone else...is this me? or is this me? today was hard....
I'm so exhausted...sick of this...up and down and constantly thinking and analyzing...I wish I could sleep like everyone else...I have all the same questions as everyone else...is this me? or is this me? today was hard....
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A Manic Episode is hardcore.Google it.
However, BP disorder does tend to worsen over time, and even when you are manic and feeling great, you are still in danger, because you also tend to do more risky things and your self control is not intact. that can actually raise your risk of suicide, even though you are manic.
And of course, the consequential let down of deep depression also adds to your risk of suicide.
So you will have to decide if/when you want to start taking meds.
My mania is not very euphoric, so it was not difficult for me to start taking meds when my depression got so bad I couldn't take it anymore. So I resisted, too.
There are two main reasons for taking meds:
1) Your manic and depressive episodes will be less severe, and less frequent, although you will still have some.
2) Your risk of suicide is diminished significantly.
Many people don't take meds until/unless their lives come to a total halt. -- They wind up in jail for the 2nd, 3rd, etc,. time, or the hospital. They have lost several jobs and can't get one anymore, and perhaps have destroyed a family or a number of relationships.
It can take some awful hard knocks to wake a person up sometimes.
Or, like my dad, you can maybe find your way through life without taking medication, but you will suffer for it - financially, socially, and physically.
And I think we all know exactly what you are talking about..if I could 'stay' hypomanic forever, I would. It feels terrific to be so productive, creative, but gets bad for me when I start spending money...just can't stop.
And ya GOTTA get meds to sleep...it's soooo important for us to get a good night's sleep. I know for me, I start raging on no sleep. And I hate that as much as the depression!
Hypo-mania is a dangerous state for many bps.
I have only spiraled into mania when adding fuel to the fire.
For me - hypo + anger = rage + alcohol and/or other drugs.
it is tough!