I went to lie down and go to sleep about 10 minutes ago and just started bawling. I hate that. I think I did it b/c I get really frustrated when people ignore me. I feel all alone and sometimes I wonder why bother even trying to explain it. Living with BP is harder then they make it out to be. I cry and I feel so stupid when I do. I don't want to tell anyone b/c I feel so dumb. I used to SI and I've been doing so good at stopping that. But sometimes, I want to so bad. I accidently missed a pill yesterday and by about 2pm I was starting to act strange and I could feel it. I just wonder if all the trouble is really worth it. Sometimes I wonder if I should just live in misery. I don't talk to many people b/c I have an issue with trust and opening up to just anyone. I still n eed help. I thought meds would do it but they're not :(
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