I am so freaking tired of these med side effects. I feel light headed. I have racing thoughts so I can't sleep yet I am tired so I can't do anything else. When I move my lips or quickly move my eyes I hear weird sounds. Almost as if I am phasing to a different reality. I blacked out for about 10 mins, lost my wife in the pouring rain while riding motorcycles during the black out, I look real hard to find her and can't. I get home and she is already changed out of wet clothese and acting like NOTHING happened...I was SOOOO worried and she didn't even give a fuck. All day she knew I was lighteheaded and yet she still didn't care. I get real pissed and she walks away instead of discussing it. I get more pissed and throw her against the wall, what does she do call 911...what the fuck am I supposed to do? I break her fucking phone so she can't call nor move and maybe she'll listen to me...nope she ends up throwing her wedding ring at the ground. I hate this bipolar I hate the meds, I hate every fucking thing in this god forsaken world. There is NO GOD out there. And if there is he is the biggest asshole for putting us through this. I can't believe there would be a god that we should worship that would allow us to go through this. I want to end it all right now, and go discuss it with him...fuck I'd love to kick his ass right now.
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