I lose interest and only need sex like time a week when I am depressed. I want it every day when manic and sometimes more. She may just be suffering and in her head so much that it dosent cross her mind.

allot of meds can make your sex drive dive and people with more depression seem to not have sex drive during low times i sometimes get so fucked with halucintions that sex is not an option usually though i have the oposite problem my husband probally wishes i didn't have succh a high sex drive i guess both are problamatic

If she is depressed she probably does not want sex at all. If she is Manic - she will f@$k you like a rabbit. Good Luck. Blue

Thanks for the replies, it's seems to be the "norm" for depression to cause lack of sex drive. Understandable. How long do most depression last? Probably sounds like a stupid question, and I'm sure it varies with severity and type, but if you had to put an average time frame on it...could you?

It's not just meds the disorder can cause lack of interest in one person. It is a terrible thing. My wife and I deal with this all the time....

mrtim...how? How do you deal with it? Tell me the magic secret....lol...please?

We struggle with this in our marriage, too as I am BP it is like an all or nothing thing totally on or totally off. I wish I had answers for you and I am sure my hubby does too. My meds are not the issue it is the brain, I think for me it is hard to stay focused when there are so many focuses. I don't understand it myself. I am not sure about a complete lack of, we are intimate just not as often as he would like I am sure, kids don't help much. I would have to say it is the depression, try the Pdoc and look into some diff medication. Hope this helps. "Big hugs" you are not alone.

God, I wish I had one... I guess it is kind of like getting bored with something after awhile. It's just the awhile for a bper is much shorter. I also believe it has to do with being completely open to any one person. Even I struggle to be completely me around my wife and when we have sex it forces complete and uninhibited openness. with a stranger it doesn't matter because the fear of judgment is not there. I hope that makes some sense. Just know that my wife and I are committed to each other and I will do what it takes to make this work, and I feel your wife is the same way. BP has so much to do with lack of control over emotion, and sometimes what we want we just cannot seem to do, but the passion and desire to do it still thrives in our hearts. In other words your wife is very much in love with you she just has a disorder that causes her to be unable to show it at certain times. I think it is a storm worth fairing... I hope that helps at least a little...

Sorry bud..I have totally lost sex drive, it has been a year since I have been interested. Am on lithium don't know if it affects everyont the same or not.

Unmedicated, bp can cause promiscuity, basically from poor judgement. But on any SSRI antidepressant, you "can" lose all desire.
If you are used to wife being the instigator, you might have to switch roles. Can't seem to get that through my husband's thick skull.
Keep in mind, too that BP oversexed is NOT intimate or loving at all, anyway.

mrtim...thanks, that atually helps alot. You're dead on, and I have NO intentions of giving up in any way. It's definately a storm, and some days are harder than others. The one nice thing about most storms is that they usually serve more of a purpose than just bad weather. Hope is definately something I'm looking for. Mine seems to diminish a little at a time. I know my wife loves me, but knowing and feeling are too different things. I've never read it anywhere that made that much sense to me. You said "...your wife is very much in love with you she just has a disorder that causes her to be unable to show it at certain times." and that makes a lot more sense than any other prospect that I've found so far. Thanks for the hope...it's GREATLY appreciated.

nutz...she's on lithium...maybe that is a player in the game. I should go research lithium a bit and it side effects and possible alternatives (if any) and see if I can gently suggest something that might work better. Thanks!

An overactive sex drive is usually one of several things people experience when they're manic. Your wife, on the other hand, is on the opposite end of the bipolar spectrum. When people get depressed, they lose interest in basically everything they used to enjoy doing, one of them being sex.

I've been experiencing a severe lack of sex-drive for some time and it's really hard to explain. The only way I can describe the feeling is like how you feel when you've eaten so much food that the mere sight of another serving completely turns you off. It really sucks and I'm sure she misses that intimacy as much as you do.

I really wishn I could offer you adive on how to deal with but I've been single for 4 years so I really wouldn't know how. All I know is that with proper medication and therapy she may start feeling like her normal self again and eventually the intimacy will come back.

blueblur....so are you saying that hypersexuality in BP is typicaly a result of being unmedicated and that it's not an intimate sexuality but rather a careless or meaningless sexual act? That also adds up. About a month ago she went of her meds for a couple weeks (I didn't immediately notice) and it was the firs time that we'd had sex twice in any 6 month period, but afterwards I was left with an empty feeling, it's was noticable enough that I actually talked to a friend about it. Hmmm.

Its a curse and a blessing the best of things the worst of things. I am physically celibate at this time and have been for over three years. Mutual decision. Cannot make love to someone I do not love. I am separated by time and distance from person I do love. I do not want not to feel sexually and so will pt up with the raging storm. I am lucky because I am deeply in love and this controls promiscuity or even thinking of another.