Great Big Hugs for you screaming. (((((HUGS))))). Marriage, kids, bipolar can be a vicious cycle of pain some times. Are you currently in talk therapy? It has helped me a great deal. It is almost impossible to deal with everything yourself, you need help and guidance. A pdoc usually just prescribes your meds and monitors your progress. A therapist can help you through the other things. There is alot of spin off from our disorder that resonates in our family's behavior. It can work, it works for me. I have four boys and a great hubby but they dont always come that way and they need help understanding where you are coming from. Don't give up, we are here to support you. I am so proud of you for reaching out. Hugs, Shelly

Dear Screaming,

I am so sorry you are struggling right now. I know exactly what it's like to have marital problems and problems with kids. I went through it for years. The main thing I did was make sure to get myself straightened out before I could deal with anything else. As Shelly suggested, a therapist does wonders. I hope you find peace and comfort soon.

I was in a very similar place not too long ago. Talk therapy and DBT classes are a huge help for learning to manage and deal with family stressors.
Best wishes to you.

This may seem inappropriate, but I've checked myself into the hospital before when I just couldn't talk it anymore. I knew if I didn't go I was going to loose it. Sometimes you need to catch your breath.

i agree with tammygirl because i have had to do the same when things in my life became too overwhelming. like she said, take a breath!

I am alway screaming at the top of my lungs to my husband IT IS TOO MUCH!!!!! and for years that is all I could say. I could never understand what the hell was going on. I got diagnosed this week so I am thankful it is something.
I have a 6 yo a 2.5 yo and a 18 month old. My hubby works from 8am - 11 pm 6 days a week I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND YOU!!!!!!!! You cant give up. I cant give you any advice on how to fix it, cause I am learning too, but I am here to understand and listen. I think also with kids it take on a whole other dimension. You cant crawl into bed, well you can but someone maybe knocking on your door. If someone saw me now they would say you dirty gross pig smelly yadda yadda, but I am up with them. I have to be, watching Elmo. Otherwise Id be in bed.
angie

make sure you have enough time for yourself, and enough support. you need to be happy before anyone else can be helped. best of luck!

I wouldn't check myself in, against the advice of everyone around me. The stress of a sick parent, high pressure job, failing marriage.
One day I just couldn't do it anymore. Took a bottle of pills, ended up in the hospital. wouldn't it have been easier if I had just signed myself in????

screaming...I totally understand what your saying,heres a few things I found helpful
Talk therapy
taking time out for me
treating myself to "pick me ups" such as flowers,scented candles,a good book.
Once every couple months my husbad get away and do somthing fun overnight.
One week vacation,one a year with my husband alone.
Hope you feel better soon.

I know some of what you are going thru and I am sorry. My wife couldn't take me anymore after 26 years and I wish I had some of the resources I have found since, like this web site. I wrote a journal this month about some of the resources I have found since my divorce 10 years ago, you might want to check out. The one that might help the most is Julie Fast's web page and free newsletter at
www.bipolarhappens.com
She helps you work out a treatment plan you can use with your spouse and doctors to track your moods and find support for your needs.
Good luck and let me know if I can answer any specific questions.

I thought it was hard raising a family and living with a spouse but it is harder dealing with this illness alone.
Work on your treatment and stay together as a family.

honestly, the only thing that helps me is talking it out with ppl.. here, counselor, parents.. sometimes i just can't sort my thoughts by myself.. sorry u are having a hard time right now..

just think how lucky u r to have a man that loves u, and a kid who depends on u for everything (no pressure!!)
I didnt give toss about me, my partner responds with "its in your head-sort it out, only you can)I was unable to commit suicide in- case my death traumatised my son, in the way my fathers death affected me-
I was able to latch on to my role as mother, and wash/tidy/chat/provide & play games with my kid,simple things, as this was my only definative purpose in life. I desperately didnt want to screw him up as much as me..
Mindfulness of breath helped me after brain-washing myself for 3 hrs a day for 6 months or more..(it occupied time if nothing else)It taught me to just be, i just am & im ok...one thing at a time..
feel free to offload anytime...It really is true, a problem shared is a problem halved - if only u got the guts to say it loud!!!

I played Supermom/wife for 3 years with no or very little help from my husband. I worked 40 hours a week,took care of the kids, and the house. In May of this year I had a total breakdown. I started getting depressed around Thanksgiving and it just got deeper and deeper. I ended up in the mental hospital twice and it took those two stays for my husband to realize that he should have done his fair share, and he is right.Because of my hospitalization, I was able to be diagnosed with BPII which explained so much of my behavior. Now b/c of everything that I have been through, my husband is very supportive most of the time.Sometimes he says things that come out wrong,but we have been able to work together to maintain better communication with my BP as well as other family matters. The kids still drive me crazy and would have if I didn't have BP, but if my husband can't help and I just can not deal with it anymore I usualy take a Klonapam and that calms me down enough to handle the kids and write down the trigger to work on later.