I am starting to slip into a major depression and I don't know what I can do to stop it. I moved back in July from North Carolina to Mississippi to go to college and to be with my girlfriend. I ended up not getting into school because I couldn't afford it. I've been looking for a job, but I can't find anything except an 8 hour a week job at the mall just for the christmas season. I try to donate plasma as much as I can to make some money but I just can't find a decent job. I live with my girlfriend and her family is taking care of us. I've sold what little things of value I had on ebay. I have no friends other than my girlfriend because I have no way of meeting anyone. I use to be an avid gamer, playing everything from dungeons and dragons to halo on xbox. But now, I don't have any of those things. I have no hobby, no friends, no family, nothing. The only thing I do is just try to keep our small apartment clean. I'm manic depressive and I use to be on medication and I saw a therapist, but now that I'm not in school I can't afford either. I can't even go to the doctor if I get sick because I don't have the money. I feel like such a failure because I don't ever do anything. I'm not contributing to anything. I'm going back to school next fall but that just seems like it's so far away I can't even begin to think about it. What can I do to make myself feel better? I'm scared that my depression phase is really going to kick in BIG TIME and my girlfriend isn't going to know how to react to me. I'm trying so hard to hang on and not slip away but it just gets harder every day. What should I do?
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