I have a HUGE & ongoing mental block that is soooo anxiety producing. In the last 6 months or so I have become so sick of housework that i've done as little as possible. I have always kept a pretty & very organized house up until then but I have an attitude I just can't seem to work out of. When my mom & dad bought a business I was 12 yrs. old & they worked long, long hours & since I was the oldest all the cooking & housework fell to me. All my married life it's been me who did everything around the house. Now I have the bad attitude that i'm 57 yrs. old, i'm tired & i'm damned SICK of housework! However, I don't like a cluttered & unattractive house, either. It distresses me a lot. I shake, I sweat & my stomach gets in knots whenever it's just absolutely necessary to put the house back in order. WHY???? Why do I have this HUGE mental block? Why don't I find any joy in housework anymore? Got any ideas how I can motivate myself to be tidy on an everyday basis? This is NOT a small issue; it is my MAJOR issue. There's a lot of guilt & shame involved here. HELP!!
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