Yeah, I'm happy with it. I mean, no, no one "wants" to be BP...but isn't it better to know than not?! I've lived my whole life, wondering what in the hell was wrong with me. Why I couldn't ever stick to something the way other people could. I always wondered why I get depressed when I don't have anything to be depressed about. Or why I'm more prone to be a sexual person, or why I do some of the things I do. I've always wondered what was wrong with me and gotten so sick of myself because I couldn't "get it together". But now, I know. I know why I've always had a problem with these things. I know that there's hope, if I take the right medications and do what I need to do for me. We as human beings are all different. I shouldn't have been comparing myself to other people. I was never going to be able to live up to what they were able to accomplish. But now, I know my limits. I know that I can push myself as long as I know what my triggers are. I can finally understand who I am, and how to achieve what I want to achieve based on my needs, and no one else's time line. I feel relieved by knowing my dx. Was anyone else relieved when they were told, for sure, this is what you are. Here is how you cope. Didn't it give anyone else hope? It's given me hope....hope that the rest of my life doesn't have to be as damn difficult as the first part!
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