I just got a call from my uncle down in alabama that my great aunt is in the hospital. She was admitted into the hospital three days ago for chest pain. Now there is fluid around her heart. I don't need to lose another family member so soon after my mom. I am so freak scared! I can't bare to go through this again. I am losing it. I can't talk anymore I need to cut or do something this is to much.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...