Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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deleted_user 10/22/2007

Have had the worst few days since my problems started and I've got no one to talk to. My mum is taking the "why are you still in bed at 4pm" approach, why arent you better yet you have every pill going. Because I'm depressed, suicidal and not sleeping, ok?! I feel rubbish and this **** illness has taken all my friends so I have no one to talk to and nowhere to go. I dont know whats wrong with me at the moment, one minute I'm trying to kill myself then I'm up at 2am dancing to my music and laughing at nothing. I should be better on all these meds. I'm starting to think there must be nothing wrong with me because nothing is touching all this ****. I must be making it all up. I need to pick up my prescription but my mum said she cant fit it in and its so far away ive got no other way of getting there. not to mention the fact i desperately need a doctors appointment in the very least for some sleeping pills and also because im going off the rails and none of the mental health team seem particularly bothered, neither does my regular GP. I'm at a loss for what to do.

deleted_user 10/22/2007

Oh geez, freedom...which meds exactly are you on now? Which one are you out of that needs to be gotten? What did the crisis team say, that sounds like they're not bothered?

I feel so bad for you...I don't really understand doctor availability in GBR, but when you tell them all these things like you've told us, what do they say?

*Hugs*, hon...

deleted_user 10/22/2007

Oh hell girl I'm with you there, doctors here are CRAP!! It took months for them to take me seriously, in the end I called them and told them I was going to kill myself that afternoon, they took notice then.
Not suggesting you do that though!

You do need to keep dogging them though, are you trying to hide how bad you feel? I do it without even thinking, and then wonder why nobody notices, it just comes out automatic to say "I'm Ok" when someone asks you how you are.

Can you get access to a prescription delivery service, some areas do it, some don't, worth looking in to though.

Sorry you are feeling so crap, if it helps come on here and let it all out, lot's of people will give you support and it sometimes helps to not feel so alone.

Lot's of hugs and love to you.
xxx

deleted_user 10/22/2007

thanks for the support. ive run out of olanzapine which isnt good because i dont want to end up psychotic again. whenever i tell the crisis team or the doctor i am at the end of my tether and suicidal they just say i have to learn distress tolerance and use my family to stay safe. but my mum gets really argumentative when im ill and it just makes things worse. i desperately need to see someone but im not seeing the crisis team until they drop me on wednesday and then i will have even less support.i dont know what to do.

deleted_user 10/22/2007

Do you have a local mental health clinic you can call? they will contact the crisis team and get them to you sooner, wednesday is too long to wait when you feel like this.

Don't take no for an answer and use that wonderful BP short fuse if you can, you need to be seen by someone. I feel for you so much, I've just been in this situation, it sucks d*ck.

xxx

deleted_user 10/22/2007

You need a new doctor, one that cares about your well being. And as far as your crisis team? I'd take another approach. 1-800-273-8255. It is a national crisis talk line. I have felt that talking to the people there were a big help to me when I needed them, they are there 24-7. I am on meds and sometimes I still feel massively bipolar, too. The meds help but they can't cure. It took my doctor a long time to get the combinations and doses right, and I still have episodes, they are just more managable now. You are not making anything up. How long have you been on meds? You are still young, and as your body changes, your need for new meds and different doses may change, too.

deleted_user 10/22/2007

Sometimes it is hard for our love ones to understand how badly we feel. I don't think anyone understands unless they have experienced it. I am sorry you feel so bad. Hang in there I care. Most people on treatment teams do realy care or they wouldn't be in the field. They also get fustrated when nothing seems to work.

It took a long time to find a mix that worked for me. I thought it would never happen but it did. Hang on and let me know if I can listen. Okiegirl

deleted_user 10/22/2007

i understand where ur coming from about losing all ur friends. mine dropped off one by one. i'm so isolated and alone now. ds is the only place where i can open up and talk. even that is extremely difficult sometimes. you took a huge step by posting this. just keep talkin cause we're listening to you.

deleted_user 10/22/2007

Drop you as in no longer covered???

In arizona we have a crisis system that will comne out and pick you up... will sometimes help you get your meds in transit and will take you despite insurance. They were hard to find but now that I know how to find em I have done so for a few people here on DS. I dont even need TOO much personal information. Few people now it but the State has a responcibility to the people living there with mental health issues. THink about it... if they didnt help those in mental health crisis and just let em all go that didnt have health insurance how unsafe the place would be... there is help and if you need help finding it I would be more then willing to help ;p

your not alone

deleted_user 10/22/2007

unfortunately im in the uk so some of the advice doesnt apply to me. i know the crisis team care but i cant stand to go on like this. im so suicidal i cant bear it anymore. i just want to sleep forever.

deleted_user 10/22/2007

Call the doctors surgery darlin, I'm in the uk too, they should alert the crisis team to come out to you. This is what they are there for. Please call.

deleted_user 10/22/2007

yes please do call if its gotten that bad you need to sometimes the crisis places and hospitals are so much better at adjusting our meds then our pdocs... when mine is just a screw up I go to the crisis unit so they can fix me and she can just do what they started

deleted_user 10/22/2007

i rang them earlier, they just said make an appointment tomorrow, i rang the crisis team but they werent much help, they just said i dont seem happy about anything and why am i not doing as he says and cleaning the house to take my mind off things. Because i havent slept in four days and can barely stand up, idiot. aargh its so hard to get help! i wish i knew what to do...thanks for the support am so grateful x

deleted_user 10/22/2007

wow do I know that feelin..

then even when i do have people to talk to I don't
go figgure but i do cone on here and for some strange ass reason I keep comin bak

deleted_user 10/22/2007

You need to give them a bit of drama, tell them you are going to kill yourself, they will take notice. It's a really good thing that you're reaching out on here, please keep talking to us.

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