Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

5,681 Members
124,567 Posts
6 Online
Mental Health
/ Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Family Reunion

deleted_user
deleted_user
I know I haven't posted lately but I've been on a major rollar coaster of rapid cycling. I need some advice though. I've got a family reunion on my dads side coming up the end of this month. I dont really want to go but as it will probably be my Dad's and possibly my grandmothers last I'm sorta umm obligated, yea thats the word, to go. At the last reunion I wasn't diagnosed, was working a summer job and in college. Looking back I now know I was also manic. I have a tendency to run my mouth when manic or anxious both of wich tend to happen when I'm around crowds, their expecting about 200 for the reunion. How can I explain that I'm not working or in school because I have an illness or should I even bother? I also could use some tips on dealing with family who are very set in their ways and uncaring. Dad had cancer and NONE of them, even his 9 brothers and sisters ever call, send a card anything. Yea I have some anger issues with them, but any advice on how I can try to at least look like I'm playing nice so as not to upset him? I'll take any tips that dont involve me giving in to the urge to become violet ():-)
deleted_user
deleted_user
Holy Sh^t! I hate social gatherings. I cannot imagine 200 people, and most related so they have that self-righteous I already know you thing going on. Well, anyways. . .I have two suggestions.
1) Apply a smile. The kind you give the asshole clerk who shorted you. You know the one that says, I don't really like you, but I won't kick your ass today-smile. Don't take it off for a second, even if someone appears real, don't take it off.
2) You are taking a hiatus. That is what you tell everyone. Say something vague like "Events have come about that allow me to fully experience life." Then add when you will be returning to school/work, even if you have no intention of doing either.

Vague and Fake, honey. When you are around people you can trust you can be yourself. But if you can't trust these people and you don't want to hurt pops, then fake it till you make it. You don't owe them a thing. I can't seem to stress that enough. I guess I just keep hearing your guilt when you talk. No guilt, it wastes energy. Focus on the people who support and love you.

Here is a little piece of advice I don't give out often. Mainly because it doesn't fit most situations. Have you ever met a politician? They never tell you what you want to hear, but they make you happy to hear what they tell you. Do a little politicking. Don't blatantly lie, but make everything seem A-OK. Sometimes it's easier than opening yourself up, and in this situation, smarter.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Just put in an appearence and then leave as you don't need the stress. I agree with Jade just smile politely and don't get into issues. Keep the conversation superficail eg how nice the flowers look or stuff like that. As for your family being supportive it doesn't sound too likely considering the way the family dealt with your Dad's cancer. My parents live in the UK and the things I tell them are censored to what I tell my real friends. If I try and talk about my BP with my Mum and Dad they just freak out and berate themselves for living so far away.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Just put in an appearence and then leave as you don't need the stress. I agree with Jade just smile politely and don't get into issues. Keep the conversation superficail eg how nice the flowers look or stuff like that. As for your family being supportive it doesn't sound too likely considering the way the family dealt with your Dad's cancer. My parents live in the UK and the things I tell them are censored to what I tell my real friends. If I try and talk about my BP with my Mum and Dad they just freak out and berate themselves for living so far away.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Just put in an appearence and then leave as you don't need the stress. I agree with Jade just smile politely and don't get into issues. Keep the conversation superficail eg how nice the flowers look or stuff like that. As for your family being supportive it doesn't sound too likely considering the way the family dealt with your Dad's cancer. My parents live in the UK and the things I tell them are censored to what I tell my real friends. If I try and talk about my BP with my Mum and Dad they just freak out and berate themselves for living so far away.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Keep your head down, keep your mouth shut, eat the food, hug the people you love, and then leave. You don't owe anybody anything more.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Go for your Dad and when he's settled in make your break. They don't sound like caring people.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Thank you all SOOO much for the advice so far. I wish i could just put in an appearance, get him settled in and leave but its being held at my grandmothers 2.5 hours away. Thank you all soo much for all the advice and support
deleted_user
deleted_user
I don't know if you take anything for your anxiety, but I'm ordering this tomorrow.

http://seredyn.com/?gclid=COnXlMyh6YwCFSCTWAodJFQV8A

A tip, you can get better prices on multiple bottles. But if you're like me you want to try it first so I'm getting one bottle. Now, they want $35 plus shipping for 1 bottle. But you can get it on ebay for $27 shipped.
deleted_user
deleted_user
My advice to you would be to bring your closest friend with you to talk to and suport you.

Tell people you are taking a well deserved break from the rat race. I feel that they really don't need to know your personal medical situation(s).

Uncareing ones: Just let them do the talking and don't initiate conversation. You can't let bad feelings you have for them spoil things for others.

This is what I would do. Its up to you to make the final decision. And, things never work out the way they are planned.

Just keep in mind: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

I wish you the best of luck and hope you have a really good time. I am sure there will be a lot of people there that you can't wait to see.
Posts You May Be Interested In
  • carrie415

    Widow/Widowers Traveling/Cruise Trips??

    Posted by: carrie415
    Last Reply: Myfavorite
    11
    I miss traveling with my husband. Has anyone found a specific site regarding cruising for widow/widowers or any sightseeing trips. Not interested in being with couples and kids,,,I realize a cruise ship will have a portion size of families and couples, but perhaps they also put together a part of the cruise ship for groups of widows/widowers????
  • joannklingaman

    Grief

    Posted by: joannklingaman
    Last Reply: loco
    13
    A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...