Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

8 Online
8 Online

Embarrasement and ruined relationships

with bipolar, in particular mania, i wondered how long it takes people to get back to normal and forgive yourself for the things done during a full blown one.

it's been almost a year since my last seveir one and i'm just now trying to release a lot of the frustration with hurt relationships in particular.

i've been through this several times and now i can forgive myself quicker than people that got offended by what i did when I wasn't normal.

How can I heal and not be embarresed faster?

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Because it's you. And you understand you, and the BP and you accept the things you've done and can forgive yourself because of it.
They don't understand at least not as well. They don't live with it. So it is harder for them to get past it.
That's the final stage of everything, right? Acceptance. And how can you completely accept if you don't really understand? They may believe it is the BP, but they don't know how little of it was you.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Its easier for me to forgive myself of some things more than others. In the 12 steps they say to tell another person about it and then give it to God. But some things I continue to take back from time to time. Especially those situations that involved me putting my kids in danger, or scaring them, or having to leave them, stuff like that.
deleted_user
deleted_user

i just figure i am always gonna have good days and bad days because of that. Have to accept that.
deleted_user
deleted_user

keeping it, instead of just letting it go, kinda helps me remember how important my meds are.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Forgive but don't forget Cluckeyo
That's how I check myself
I know what I've done and I reign myself in with the memories of how it hurt them, and knowing how it will hurt them . I call it the shame factor. I now if my mom knew, she'd be hurt and disappointed. I'd feel ashamed. don't wanna make her feel that
deleted_user
deleted_user

well like i say, i have more success on some days than other days, in forgiving myself. Thats just the facts of my life. And I accept that.
deleted_user
deleted_user

You have to live one day at a time. And do the best you can with that day. Try to stay right in that day. Without looking back or into the future. Just wrestle with that day. Today is all we have, really!
deleted_user
deleted_user

At this juncture in my life, I don't feel I will ever be able to forgive myself for the things I have done in the past. If other people can't forgive me then why should I forgive myself? I'm sure you will find a better way than me.