I truely dont want to go on. I dont want to commit suicide because I dont want to hurt my kids but I just dont want to go on. I have been slipping ever deeper over the last 3 days and I am hitting the bottom. Even thought I know I have help coming (My case working is seeing me tomorrow and NOT in my house) I just dont have the strengh and the will power to go on. TOnight I wasnt even going to eat. I didnt want t spend the energy to cook. I feel like Im drowning and I know I should Snap out of it but I cant. My meds arent helping. My pain meds arent helping I hurt inside and I hurt mentally. Life just isnt worth living if I have to live in so much pain and dispair. I havent touched my cross stich in a month since I was hospitalized and I usually love it. I havent played my online game (WOW) and actually leveled my character in well almost a month. Im not me and I really really am hating this and just want to give up pack my bags and leave. My kids could get over mom leaving cause she went mental. Im just going to give up.
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